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Quote #2026 (+8) [ 2004-06-03, 22:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> on the way back from pub/crown we saw 6x patrol cars, 3x divvy vans, a police campervan thing and a helicopter
<Rage> all weaving through some park
<CrashDummy> police picnic
<Rage> this was like 1am CrashDummy :P
<CrashDummy> the law never sleeps

Quote #1876 (+3) [ 2004-04-26, 17:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Remote_Man> Scientists say that one day women will have intelligent DNA inside of them, it's just too bad that 95% of them will spit it out.
<PsychoMatt> you think sperm are intelligent? man you must be pretty damn retarded
<Draffa> Sperm can remember directions.
<PsychoMatt> yeh i guess women cant do that

Quote #3367 (+3) [ 2006-05-15, 09:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

Kalash: Trapped miner, wife 'shared telepathy'
Kalash: THE wife of trapped miner Brant Webb was convinced her husband was alive all through his two-week ordeal in which she communicated with him by telepathy, her father said in a diary
Kalash: this is why those miners will not get a deal.
Rainwulf: what freaking morons
Rainwulf: telepathy doesnt work underground!

Quote #482 (+4) [ 2003-04-20, 20:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Junkz> women suck
<VooDoo> only the good ones Junkz
<VooDoo> ok.. some of the bad ones too

Quote #4091 (+9) [ 2007-04-25, 15:15 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Dopefish`> I've only heard of it happening a few times and one story involved ecstasy taking and going crazy with about 8 liters of water or so
<LemMinG> good old dihydrogen monoxide
<Wayne> hydroxic acid
<Wayne> hydrogen hydroxide
<Tabris> sky juice :P

Quote #1874 (+2) [ 2004-04-25, 22:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

<TensopAway> Currawong: i'm pondering sticking my wang in a pencil sharpener
<bh> TensopAway: it can fit?
<TensopAway> bh: yeah, my cock is mega small..

Quote #1369 (+1) [ 2003-11-22, 20:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

(rodgrech) man im scared.... i gotta walk into a Apple store (nextbyte) next few days
(Snufkin`) wear protection
(Snufkin`) otherwise you might catch gay
(FreeFrag) Thier prices are an ass rape
(rodgrech) ill have my windblows xp cd with me for protection
(rodgrech) 179.00 for a 65 watt laptop charger
(Largo) haha instead of using a cross on posessed people, throw windows XP at them and watch them burn
(rodgrech) burnt windows xp cds cut up and made into ninja stars
(Snufkin`) haha
(rodgrech) or my ibook of doom with windows xp loaded on it :D
(Largo) i wanted to get an ipod, i gotta walk in there with a radiation suit
(FreeFrag) Lets not forget a full retail copy of MacOSX is $229 :o
(Tensop) Largo: shut your....
(Largo) they'd probaly consider that laptop weapon of mass destruction :p

Quote #1215 (+6) [ 2003-10-24, 21:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Immo_G): had ya 12 barons table 'burgers' for the day
(tensop): eww barons table
(tensop): you know how they make that
(tensop): they stick a 20v+ probe to a peice of cardboard
(tensop): the other to some dog meat
(Immo_G): lol
(tensop): stick both of em in some water
(Immo_G): hahahaha rofl
(Immo_G): electroplated meat

Quote #1622 (+6) [ 2004-02-10, 22:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Erve slaps echelon around a bit with a large trout
* echelon de-trouts Erve
<Erve> nooo
* Erve slaps echelon with a yellow-fin tuna
<Erve> it's just not the same :(
<echelon> rofl

Quote #1536 (+4) [ 2004-01-19, 20:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Vassili> hey Cav, are you the guy that everyone thinks/knows is gay?

Quote #1191 (+2) [ 2003-10-22, 13:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> whats that popular fan/temperature program thing that nearly everyone uses
<knowsfords> motherboard monitor isnt it?
<knowsfords> thanks knowsfords
<knowsfords> don't mention it

Quote #475 (+57) [ 2003-04-17, 00:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> i think the biggest purchasers of cheerleader costumes would be pr0n sites... :P
<bundy> that and kinky old me
<bundy> men
<bundy> men
<bundy> shit
<bundy> typo

Quote #2393 (+46) [ 2004-11-20, 18:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

<V8R> my son can dismantle anything :(
<Redback> hide the screwdrivers
<One``> you dont want to come home to a pile of dismantled screwdrivers

Quote #604 (+1) [ 2003-05-29, 02:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ReSiN> word
<josh_ip_te> word?
<ReSiN> word is bond
<ineffable> sup yoi
<ineffable> -i
<josh_ip_te> yo, g, check yo nine at da door and all dat shiznit
<josh_ip_te> da hoochies ain't been kicking it upside heah, know what i'm sayin'
<josh_ip_te> sif word
<ReSiN> yo dog i aint strappin, packin cols steady mackin
<josh_ip_te> well ese, i pack no piece, but i get el coyote up in yo face
* josh_ip_te throws down
<ReSiN> u packin yo shit, punk get a grip, im knockin your mums sis and cus suckin tit
<josh_ip_te> rofl
<ineffable> i love it
<josh_ip_te> WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SMOKING? can i have some
* Draffa falls off his chair laughing
* josh_ip_te hands ReSiN some bling-bling so he can get some 20's for his lolo
<ineffable> you can't be white

Quote #2740 (+2) [ 2005-05-09, 21:58 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@D_Web> it looks like telstra is being stupid again
<@D_Web> irc is working but that's about it
<@D_Web> I'll be disconnected in a sec
* D_Web has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
* D_Web has joined #ugbox
<@D_Web> power cycled the modem
<@D_Web> should be ok for about 30 seconds
<@Falkor> WOOO
<@Falkor> TALK QUICKLY
<@Falkor> OMG D_Web how was your day?
<@Falkor> good? yes. cool. hows your mum?
<@Falkor> good? cool how was the weather?
<@Falkor> awesome! when are you buying a new car?!?
<@Falkor> tomorrow! WOOOOO!! YEAH!!
<@gords> heh
* D_Web` has joined #ugbox
* Z sets mode: +o D_Web`
<@Falkor> ahh shit.

Quote #1660 (+20) [ 2004-02-19, 19:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> It's ugbox.net right?
<@gords> yes
<FreeFrag> *sigh* I'm so farked.
<knowsfords> FreeFrag: gamble the domain at the casino and lost it?
<FreeFrag> Yeah.
<FreeFrag> Sorry guys.
* Z sets mode: +o FreeFrag
<knowsfords> you just have a vendetta against ugbox dont you?
* FreeFrag changes topic to 'Sorry guys, FreeFrag gambled the ugbox.net domain name at the casino last night and lost. We're now hot-naked-giraffes.com (Hey, it isn't that bad)'
* Fod changes topic to '"FreeFrag ... last night ... hot naked giraffes" - that's all i could make out'

Quote #1788 (+11) [ 2004-03-29, 23:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Ultimata> god my bird is nuts: he just put his head into his bell like a helmet and goes crazy whistling
<b0x> remembering bird nam :p
<Draffa> "Kitty! In the trees!"

Quote #4085 (+3) [ 2007-04-22, 20:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<devians> snakes on a laptop! :P
<Torched> motherfuckin snakes!
<Torched> on a laptop!
<The_Dan> ive never been shaped on adsl
<brodsta> motherfucking snakes motherfuckers!
<devians> well, snake rather than snakes
* rodgrceh has quit (Quit)
* rodgrceh (rodgrech@60-241-54-83.tpgi.com.au) has joined #overclockers
<wayne> snakes on a SPARTAAAA!

Quote #1851 (+12) [ 2004-04-17, 16:20 ] [ + | - | X ]

<BenZ|WiFi> Oh fuck
<BenZ|WiFi> we chucked a tommo
<BenZ|WiFi> CD Player + Wireless and now im stuck out the front of someones house on wireless.
<WMinstrel> BenZ, suck it.
<WMinstrel> BenZ, net send the people inside for help.
<V8R[2400]> hmm, i cant spot the problem, BenZ|WiFi
<WMinstrel> "Hello? I'm outside stealing bandwidth, can you help me?"

Quote #4318 (+6) [ 2008-05-13, 21:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Dopefish> uk.news.yahoo.com Bournemouth has become the first town in the UK to get super-fast internet connections - via the sewerage system. More than 88,000 homes and businesses in the Dorset town will benefit from internet speeds up to 100Mbps under the scheme, considerably faster than consumer broadband speeds on the market.
<Dopefish> Lets go to dorset!!
<InTheFade> poonet ftw
<Agg> you can download all the shit you want, bro

Quote #4199 (+10) [ 2007-08-15, 15:40 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Goose1981> if i could vote for a Pro-lolcat party in the upcoming federal election.. i would.
<Goose1981> i would also donate to their election fund.. and subscribe to their newsletter.
<Hrdwr_BoB> what a coincidence
<Hrdwr_BoB> I am your local lolcat representative
<Hrdwr_BoB> I will send you my banking details asap.
<Goose1981> i can has DD details?

Quote #52 (+2) [ 2002-11-05, 11:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<SileNceR> finally got it in
<SileNceR> my poor fingers :(

Quote #3124 (+17) [ 2005-12-06, 21:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> How on earth do I disable this spawn of fucking satan bullshit called the office clipboard - I want to COPY and then PASTE - I dont want this shit to think for itself and remember by last 73 fucking copies then paste the wrong fucking thing JESUS CHRIST MICROSOFT JUST MAKE IT EASY
<BBQ_69> FreeFrag, it looks like your writing a letter..

Quote #1743 (+2) [ 2004-03-15, 21:02 ] [ + | - | X ]

<PsychoMatt> bh, why do you have that many coins?
<bh> PsychoMatt: i take coins out of my wallet each day
<bh> because theyre annoying to sit on
<bh> and i just chuck them in this container
<Fragwizard> heh
<PsychoMatt> i could count the amount of coons i have in one hand
<PsychoMatt> COINS
<Lombers> that's going to ugbox
<Squigy> ...
<bh> haha

Quote #143 (+5) [ 2002-12-06, 01:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Draffa> :)
<Quadbox> :)
<Cav> :0
<Cav> oops
<Cav> :)

Quote #2629 (+9) [ 2005-03-17, 18:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fod|Work> i was watching the CCTV screens, keeping an eye on this guy who was loitering around, not doing anything
<Fod|Work> watched him for quite a while and he didn't move a muscle
<Fod|Work> then i realised it was me :S

Quote #691 (+1) [ 2003-06-22, 19:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<D_Web> why spend $600 on a wireless router?
<WhiteyFord> because you cant afford a $700 hooker?

Quote #1866 (+7) [ 2004-04-22, 23:26 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Simboo> I swear the worst part about living with women is the amount of toilet paper they use
<Simboo> it's phenominal

Quote #1157 (+2) [ 2003-10-18, 22:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<mazzanet> [22:01] * Agg (agg@203.173.27.67) Quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer) <----oh noes Agg got assinated by peer
<FreeFrag> he got hit by a deer?
<Redback> that should be aggs quit message
<Redback> Connection reset by deer
<afta|shwr> ahhhaah
<mazzanet> lol

Quote #1551 (+7) [ 2004-01-24, 10:43 ] [ + | - | X ]

(sbobz) a mate of mine used to be 'the phantom shitter' at my school... we had those tv's that are suspended by an arm attached to roof etc... you'd get into class and there'd be a fresh man-turd up there, or in the teachers drawer, or in the middle of the floor, or in the staff room, etc..
(sbobz) was quite good at it
(Largo) phantom shitter rofl
(Hibba) lol
(sbobz) he'd crap in highly unlikely places
(sbobz) and never got busted

Quote #921 (+14) [ 2003-08-17, 15:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

* FLoRa gives FreeFrag another cookie for being cool
<FreeFrag> If I get cookies based on how cool I am, I should have the whole packet.
<FreeFrag> *grin*
<brembo`> an empty packet that is

Quote #53 (+4) [ 2002-11-06, 01:12 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> Agg, what did I win?
<Agg> FreeFrag - you won a "kick in the nuts" voucher, redeemable at your nearest Agg outlet.
<Agg> (not exchangeable for cash)

Quote #1941 (+3) [ 2004-05-09, 18:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

<TensopAway> the problem is melbourne isnt cold weather
<TensopAway> its more like an explosion of randomness

Quote #1787 (+14) [ 2004-03-29, 22:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> cmon, you slow pos.
* knowsfords punches his modem
* knowsfords - Quit (Quit: connection reset by peer)

Quote #1534 (+4) [ 2004-01-18, 23:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> sciby's a master at playing with himself
<Agg> errm, sabretooth.
<sabretooth> Yeah... back in your box

Quote #3110 (+5) [ 2005-11-27, 16:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

(modafroman) anyone got a spare blue ccfl they wanna give me?
(Ultimata) modafroman, rice from Woolies is cheaper.

Quote #3558 (+2) [ 2006-09-20, 00:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<thetron> Will[A]y: Well i have no mobile. Only a Skype line :)
<Will[A]y> thats totally useless but ok :)
<@Agg> how forward-thinking of you :)
<@Agg> unless you want to leave your house at any point.

Quote #2837 (+7) [ 2005-06-22, 00:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

[@Ashley]: Oh, and I've got a three-tier sequential data recovery system.
[@Ashley]: Meaning I've got two computers and and a removable backup disk. I love the technoloyg names.
[@Warhamster]: or, a fish on a wire
[@Ashley]: Really?
* Warhamster uses his fish backup
[@Ashley]: How does that work?
[@Warhamster]: when the fish starts to smell, new backup

Quote #621 (+8) [ 2003-06-04, 04:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

(aCealots): for dicksmith has a cheese call :) dickcheese)
(Domin8): lol
(Cav): dick cheses?
(Domin8): yeah dick smiths cheese he means
(Cav): did he really call it dick cheese
* Cav was most amused by dick heads
(Domin8): yeah
(aCealots): i never want to try the dick for my self,i never new it tase any good
(Domin8): lol
(Darkness): lol
(Domin8): lol
(Domin8): rofl

Quote #704 (+9) [ 2003-06-27, 15:42 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Falkor[A]> none of us smoke aye?
<DDsD|walk> Smoke? only when im well fuct and someone gives me one..
* Rik|out roots DDsD|walk then gives him a smoke
<DDsD|walk> Awww yeah

Quote #601 (+2) [ 2003-05-28, 16:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Enfilade> I feel pretty hardcore after my nap
<Enfilade> I had a dream about stealing knickers from some woman's clothes line

Quote #1135 (+62) [ 2003-10-15, 07:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

<CapnChron> MY GOD!!!
<CapnChron> I'm soo gonna fucking kick my sister out of the house
<CapnChron> She's a paradise
<CapnChron> erm
<CapnChron> Parasite!
<@Frag[W]> LOL
* @Frag[W] falls over.
<CapnChron> I feel voliated now!
<CapnChron> Yesterday my sister says she's having a friend over because our parents ain't here for few days.
<CapnChron> Right..
<CapnChron> This morning... I came home from work
<CapnChron> about 6:45am
<CapnChron> I go upstairs.. There's 2 kitchens
<CapnChron> One downstairs, one upstairs
<CapnChron> I'm like..
<CapnChron> Fuck man
<CapnChron> this is gross
<CapnChron> happened to me TWICE@!
<CapnChron> Right.. This girl!
<CapnChron> She's sitting on the stool eating breakfast looking at the view
<CapnChron> I'm like "Damn... She's wearing panties and a pink shirt
<CapnChron> I'm thinking sexy thoughts what I want to do with her
<CapnChron> "hot ass. I'd tap that!"
<CapnChron> All that shit you guys would think when you see some hot ass
<CapnChron> I go to the fridge to get a milkshake to join the girl
<CapnChron> Guess who I see walks into the kitchen
<CapnChron> Her fucking friend
<CapnChron> I'm like "wtf"
<CapnChron> She says hello
<CapnChron> I go "Hi..." Looked over to this girl...
<CapnChron> Eww
<CapnChron> i'M SICK
<CapnChron> I thought sexy thoughts of my fucking sister again!
* CapnChron jumps off from his bedroom window
<CapnChron> TWICE!!!
* CapnChron feeds his sister shitloads of food
<CapnChron> Get fat bitch!
<@Lone[Zz]> dude ... that's going straight to ugbox

Quote #1103 (+2) [ 2003-10-11, 01:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

* neolithic breaks out in an unnecessary rap
<Frag|A> * neolithic breaks out in an unnecessary crap <--Having a normal day again neo?

Quote #4153 (+2) [ 2007-06-07, 19:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sunset> ffs i was at work tonight till 6:30pm for a hung jury :(
<Torched> how do you know they were hung?

Quote #795 (+4) [ 2003-07-16, 19:43 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Infra|Gone> talk to my butt, cause the face aint listening
<Carrots> infra, they are easy to mistake for one another

Quote #1141 (+7) [ 2003-10-15, 18:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<neolithic> FUCK
<neolithic> sister clicked restart on gateway
<rade> bye neolithic :P
<neolithic> turns out it was log off :P
<Darmok> panic merchant
<Fodzilla> drama queen
<aftahours> poof

Quote #3880 (+1) [ 2006-12-21, 18:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fod> my computer was frozen by a dick in a box

Quote #104 (+4) [ 2002-11-20, 06:12 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jester> why does spoof have to smell bad why cant it smell nice like a fragrence smell
<GooSE> Imagine you could choose your fragrance though.. like... Mystery for dicks, by Calvin Klein
<shift> "Obsession for wankers" by CK
<Jester> if it was a fragrance though i guess people would be spoofing everywhere all over the room if they were expecting visitors
<FreeFrag> "oh yeah hhmmmm that's the way" *ding dong* "oh shit"

Quote #488 (+15) [ 2003-04-22, 19:22 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Grog`> a good immunity is to piss on yourself twice daily
<Grog`> i've been doing it for years
<Grog`> and i haven't caught SARS

Quote #1034 (+4) [ 2003-09-12, 16:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<echelon> ebay: Your best source for ripping off stupid people. liek omghi2u socheep!