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Quote #1434 (+9) [ 2003-12-11, 18:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> I bought the biggest mango's I have ever seen
<knowsfords> if they were tits they'd be d-cups
<Erve> whoa
* Erve conjours up that image without knowsfords in it.
<Erve> them be perfect.
<knowsfords> they're huge.
<knowsfords> $2.95 ea from coles.
<Erve> damn, I wish tits came that cheap.
<Fod> if you know the right Bolivian surgeon, they do

Quote #3136 (+11) [ 2005-12-12, 20:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Freaek> Condense soup, not books!
<gords> reader's digest bothering you again, Freaek?
<Freaek> those lousy fuckers
<Freaek> word nazis!
<TheWedgie> lol
<Freaek> oh sure, you laugh now, but just you wait. It'll be a lolercaust all over again

Quote #1963 (+12) [ 2004-05-15, 18:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Freaek> argh
<Freaek> just woke up
<Freaek> fell aslseep at the pc
<Freaek> got keyboard indent on my head
<Freaek> :(
<Freaek> fucken sore

Quote #1738 (+8) [ 2004-03-11, 00:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

<adi> a win xp gnome theme is the most downloaded per day
<adi> art.gnome.org
<adi> ROFL!! i just installed the winXP theme, and i selected it, and gnome crashed!! they managed to get the windows theme just perfect!!

Quote #104 (+4) [ 2002-11-20, 06:12 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jester> why does spoof have to smell bad why cant it smell nice like a fragrence smell
<GooSE> Imagine you could choose your fragrance though.. like... Mystery for dicks, by Calvin Klein
<shift> "Obsession for wankers" by CK
<Jester> if it was a fragrance though i guess people would be spoofing everywhere all over the room if they were expecting visitors
<FreeFrag> "oh yeah hhmmmm that's the way" *ding dong* "oh shit"

Quote #2953 (+1) [ 2005-08-26, 20:37 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Umber> I always found school totally contradictory
<Umber> In normal schools, trying to pat your head while rubbing your stomach is considered somewhat of a scientific experiment to find how much self control you have
<Umber> Whilst in "special" schools, it's a sign of no self control whatsoever

Quote #1720 (+11) [ 2004-03-04, 23:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

<magey> This is never more evident than in wedding pictures. There's always the glimmering, breathtakingly beautiful bride, arms linked to some tuxedoed chimp who looks more like he should be on a corner somewhere banging symbols together for change. This is actually why the wedding veil was first invented. We needed a way to hide how much more attractive the bride was and paper bags were too blatant.
<nwatts> rofl
<nwatts> hahaha
<nwatts> that is fucking gold
<FatMan> ROFL!
<magey> The closest thing guys have to wonderbras are those novelty t-shirts with the muscles drawn on them.

Quote #874 (+6) [ 2003-08-10, 23:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rik> shouldnt people be in bed by now?
<@sniper2083> Rik you should be cos its ADULTS hour now
<@Agg> adult hour? do we get exotic dancers and gambling?

Quote #1415 (+7) [ 2003-12-05, 00:02 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Akumas> Agg, aren't you the almighty owner of OCAU?
<Agg> coroner - because they are profoundly uncomfortable for long distances :)
<Hunter> agg would that be like riding a mountain bike for a couple of days
<Agg> Akumas - no, that's a guy called thetron.. i just work here
* Banzai is now known as Banzai[CS]
<Akumas> Oh, sorry.. 'work' are you employed by ocau?
* BBQ_69 has quit IRC (Quit: Connection reset by retards trying to toast buns.)
<coroner> hopefully they have improved i plan to ride to phillip island in 2 yrs
<Moose> What bike is comfortable for long distances?
<Hunter> a trike
<Agg> kinda. it's part of my parole agreement. counts as community service.
<Akumas> I see I see..
* definate has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
<Akumas> Hope I'm not being too nosey

Quote #2883 (+2) [ 2005-07-16, 10:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Lombers> I have decided
<Lombers> I hate all PC places now
<Lombers> the problem is, they know nothing about customer service
<Lombers> because the people who started the good ones are pretty much geeks
<Lombers> and have no idea how to actually interact with people
<Lombers> sure they know their tech stuff
<Lombers> but that's about it
<Redback> what do they do when a girl wants to buy a new motherboard?
<Lombers> they premature ejaculate
<Redback> rofl
<pace> its not like i ordered a $15 modem
<Lombers> I know, and that's the problem
<Lombers> their problem is, they keep thinking to themselves that they will be able to get it in
<Lombers> instead of saying "look, I'll be conservative here, it'll take 2 weeks minimum"
<Lombers> then if they get it in earlier the customer would be like "omg that's the best service ever"

Quote #2621 (+1) [ 2005-03-10, 16:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Borg> anyone remember a poll showing the age demographic of OCAU ?
<Agg> "how old are you?" in the pub
<Agg> iirc
<Borg> The following words are either very common, too long, or too short and were not included in your search : how, old, are, you
<sabretooth> haha
<Agg> rofl

Quote #589 (+1) [ 2003-05-23, 11:32 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rik_> now I have my gf's ebay login, I can impulse buy as much as I want :s

Quote #1612 (+5) [ 2004-02-09, 00:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Hunter> sif the red cross needs more donations, all they need do is ask fucking kerry packer to extract some blood from a stone

Quote #1693 (+11) [ 2004-02-26, 10:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<edj> last night i saw the most amazing shooting star
<edj> it was huge, not moving too fast
<edj> then after around 10 seconds, it broke into around 5 glowing pieces
<edj> then faded away
<Draffa_> then you went blind?
<Draffa_> and plants started taking over the world!
<echelon> edj: Jetstar's maiden flight

Quote #2471 (+33) [ 2005-01-06, 18:14 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Alyra> rice sends horses nuts at times, yay
<outonan|pc> so rice is bad for horses?
<Alyra> rice isnt bad for them
<Alyra> it can just make them really hyper.
<Alyra> Like if you have red cordial :P
<Agg> wait a second.. you're saying rice DOES add horse power?

Quote #1177 (+5) [ 2003-10-20, 17:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Tate): mmmm cork
(Tate): I mean
(Tate): mmmm sarah
(Trav): cork?!
(Tate): cork
(Tate): on a bottle
(Tate): you know
(Trav): ewww you sick fetish boy
(Tate): CORK NOT CAWK
(Tate): :P
(Tate): different spelling
(Trav): tate a cork and a cawk, both would go the same place for you
(bundy): LOL
(Tate): hhahahaa

Quote #1444 (+11) [ 2003-12-15, 11:22 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yyk> i'm hungry but i don't want to eat
<Agg> me too
<Agg> but in an hour or so i will go to bowral and get subway
<Agg> under the pretense of testing the new headunit in the van
<yyk> wanna swing by here and get me off?
<yyk> one
<yyk> ONE
<Agg> get you off??
<yyk> ><
<Agg> dude, Dr Freud would have a field day with you
<Agg> (but I don't know if he'd get you off)

Quote #2663 (+2) [ 2005-04-02, 22:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yale> thetron: when you learn to spell, you can pick on people :)
<thetron> I can sell
<ace[work]> bwuhaha
<Lurks> omgooglies
<ace[work]> now thetron shutup before you make an even bigger arse of yourself :)
<yale> well, that proves my point entirely.
<yale> if you want, I can help you jam the other foot in your mouth :)

Quote #1740 (+2) [ 2004-03-11, 18:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

<DJStudd> Is it possible to have a normal blood pressure, yet have "slower flowing" blood? All 3 times I've gone to have blood extracted (blood bank (Was really dizzy for a long while after it) and 2 blood tests) the blood has flowed REALLY slowly
<thetron> DJStudd: No sexual activitys between those 2 intervals

Quote #4353 (+3) [ 2008-07-27, 21:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<sg> HAI
<Tank> HAI
<@Wayne> HAI
<Tank> HAI
<glasnt> BAI
<@Wayne> NAI
<@Sniper9300> WAI
<Tank> YAI
<SirPNut> anyway, night guys
<@Wayne> GAI
<brodsta> NOWAI
<@Agg> FISH
<@Agg> wait, what

Quote #2593 (+6) [ 2005-02-17, 22:15 ] [ + | - | X ]

<aftahours> just wait for adsl to be activated Agg :D
<Agg> aftahours - I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR 15 MONTHS!!!
<Agg> aherrrm.
<Agg> calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean.. with lag.. graarrghh
<aftahours> ahahaha

Quote #3186 (+10) [ 2006-01-11, 13:40 ] [ + | - | X ]

SgtMjrTech: i swear i want to know what my sis does on this pc.... trojan after trojan after trojan
Bern: maybe she's storming troy

Quote #4151 (+10) [ 2007-06-07, 12:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

BFM: Bah, How do I block smilies from my mates MSN. He's assigned normal letters to flashing gifs ffs
echelon_: BFM: the first step is to punch your mate in the face

Quote #3064 (+9) [ 2005-11-02, 17:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> so I got a chicken breast and smeared honey on it then wrapped it in bacon and put it in the oven... holy crap it turned out awesome
<brembo`> last time i tried to wrap a breast in bacon i got slapped :\

Quote #2693 (+5) [ 2005-04-18, 15:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Tensop`): but realisticly i want $3 trillion, not $20k.
(Tensop`): and then i'd buy a mitsubishi sigma
(Tensop`): hire the people who made the astron engine, fire them, and hire new people to redesign an astron engine

Quote #1503 (+5) [ 2004-01-11, 20:12 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> i should take a pic of me now
<Rage> none of them are current
<Rage> i'm a lot less boyish :D
<Tommmo> hahahah
<Fod> more girlish now?
<Tommmo> what, you're a bit girly ?
<Tommmo> aha fod beat me to it
<knowsfords> Fod: dammit!
<Tommmo> nothing wrong with that rage
<Tommmo> our society embraces diversity
<knowsfords> and if you want to be a women, we wont stop you.

Quote #603 (+4) [ 2003-05-29, 01:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Darkness): There was a better online version somewhere. Where it gave it back to you in wav format. I once put a very nasty wav file (regarding a fat and ugly friend of my ex's) on a mix cd i made. Turns out, that cd came on at a party... MAN , was i popular after that one!
(MadHatter): lol
(MadHatter): logoff
(Darkness): I couldn't, it was real life!

Quote #1423 (+4) [ 2003-12-07, 13:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

[Junkz0r] why do the call the main control room of a shit the 'bridge' and why is the nav/steering console the 'helm' ??
[Malbert] i call the control room of a shit my asshole

Quote #1021 (+7) [ 2003-09-10, 00:15 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> I've never actually made that noise because of sabz, biatch, so forgive me if I get the pronunciation wrong. :)
<sabretooth> Agg's still in denial.
<Agg> no i'm not!
<sabretooth> Agg, I was good, don't you deny it :P
<Agg> hmm, that explains where that 2 minutes I can't remember went.
<sabretooth> You... you... floosy!
* sabretooth takes off the ring and throws it at Agg.
<Agg> yeah, well, i faked every one of 'em, bitch!
* sabretooth slaps Agg, storms out and slams the door behind him.

Quote #155 (+4) [ 2002-12-11, 06:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<bobSNEE> dont you hate it when you accidently break your mobo while inserting ram :(
<Manaz> bob: You're not supposed to use a hammer!

Quote #957 (+11) [ 2003-08-27, 17:13 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Pure-delight> ppl tell lies a lot - on my icq i put my details as being only 13 years old because i did not want strangers trying to have cybersex with me
<RoSWeLL> lol and what would stop them ?
<RoSWeLL> i thought it would encourage them more

Quote #1278 (+6) [ 2003-11-04, 22:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Draebor hands DDsD a hashcookie
<DDsD> pfft hash?
<DDsD> hash is for n00bs :p
<DDsD> How about a cokecookie? =D

Quote #3268 (+2) [ 2006-02-25, 18:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

<deepspring> you alive
<outy> yeah
<outy> sup??
<deepspring> nothing much... just saw a guy on the news from ipswich that got shot
<deepspring> the guy was a mental patient and apparently wen burko
<outy> lol
<outy> glad to see you thought about me
<deepspring> I was really worried
<deepspring> http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems/200602/s1578252.htm

Quote #2126 (+9) [ 2004-07-09, 23:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sciby2> Guys, anyone who's got my mobile number, can they please pm or sms me their details again... yay for having a blank phone. If I don't know you, don't pm me your number, because I'll just post it to alt.mental-problems.sociopath.day-release-programs

Quote #113 (+3) [ 2002-11-22, 12:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> I just had a shave...
<knowsfords> the sink was overflowing with hair
<z3[n]> knowsfords: did u shave ur legs or something?
<knowsfords> z3[n]: nah my face... if it were my legs then the whole bathroom would be overflowing with hair

Quote #1817 (+6) [ 2004-04-10, 21:43 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Narcolepsy> I can think of SO many games that need co-op modes...
<Redback> sex games in particular

Quote #1791 (+14) [ 2004-03-30, 22:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> noone is gunna play mta?
* wild has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
* brembo` has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
* Rage has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
* Lombers has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
* gords- has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
* FreeFrag has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
* Falkor has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
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* CrashDumy has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
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* Z has quit IRC (*.net *.split)
<TheWedgie> LOL
<TheWedgie> i'd take that as a no.
<Fod> heh

Quote #1770 (+6) [ 2004-03-25, 20:31 ] [ + | - | X ]

<gords> this channel is getting taken over by tasmanians =(
<Nozz> <gords> this channel is getting taken over by tasmanians =( <-- you know you love us
* Nozz group hugs Crystal, Saga, jase etc
<Tensop> tasmanians suck
<Crystal> Tasmania power! :D
<Tensop> heh, nozz, Crystal`, Saga and jase are all brothers/sisters :)

Quote #2718 (+1) [ 2005-04-28, 10:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

[ canadiant]: Im in love lol. I found a girl that can subnet! :D

Quote #4252 (+4) [ 2007-12-10, 23:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

* vanguard has quit (Quit: LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE! ;_;)
<brodsta> Britney is fat
<V8R> so turn off the lights :P
* V8R gorn
<brodsta> Lights off, glasses on, hair up?
<Rainwulf> paper bag
<brodsta> lol
<ace234> 2 paper bags, incase hers falls off

Quote #2437 (+1) [ 2004-12-19, 10:43 ] [ + | - | X ]

<SuroK> agg, check the bans list
<SuroK> huh
<Agg> why?
<SuroK> it says im banned
<SuroK> i joind alright
<SuroK> i had a temp ban last night
<SuroK> but wehy is that still ythere
*** Mode change "+b *!*@220.233.27.128" for channel #overclockers by aftahours
<Jester> yea he should fix the ban up properly.
<Draffa> problem olved!
*** SuroK has been kicked off channel #overclockers by aftahours (you're still banned)
<Cycle> lol
<Poo[A]> lol
<Poo[A]> denied

Quote #1801 (+2) [ 2004-04-04, 22:58 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sciby> From what FF said and from my fuzzy memory, it went along the lines of 'TheTron is talking out of his magical ass.' I think Agg said it.
<thetron> Sciby and FreeFrag keep your flame wars comfined to #overclockers and only there. Calling people names and flaming them isn't productive and gets you no credit
<FreeFrag> thetron, you're silly, and I'll say that wherever I want.
<Sciby> thetron: I don't need no steenking credit.

Quote #2679 (+5) [ 2005-04-12, 20:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<WhiteyFord> according to whereis.com.au, Rik lives 3.55 km from me, Estimated travel time: 1 Hr 13 Mins
<Rage> lol
<Rage> sydney traffic

Quote #1334 (+8) [ 2003-11-14, 22:13 ] [ + | - | X ]

<zombie> linux/unix is userfriendly
<zombie> it's just selective about who it's friends are

Quote #3527 (+3) [ 2006-08-29, 00:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

·Recharge· omfg... an entire thread in whirlpool optus without fanbois telling everyone that optus is perfection... ok, I expect the world to end any time now....
(..quit..) outy [outonanisl@c210-49-250-58.ipswc1.qld.optusnet.com.au] (Read error: Connection reset by peer) [12:59am]
·Willay· lol bai bai OUTY :P
•Fragwizard• LOL thats ironic

Quote #1267 (+1) [ 2003-11-02, 22:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rik> ROFl, one of my mates fucked a chick with no arms
<WhiteyFord> what really Rik?
<WhiteyFord> thats odd
<WhiteyFord> no hand jobs :(
<Rik> yeh, he's in the Navy, he's done alot of fucked shit
<FreeFrag> :o
<Rik> he was telling me, he did her doggy style on the beach and was going hard, and when he finished, he had almost buried her head since she couldnt keep it above sand
<WhiteyFord> did she have arms before they started fucking?
<WhiteyFord> ROFL
<Falkor> lol she has no arms, and heres mike worrying about not getting a hand job :)
<FreeFrag> ROFL!
<WhiteyFord> ahahahahahahahahhahaa
<Falkor> hahaha
<knowsfords> heh.
<WhiteyFord> thats the most horrible funny thing i have ever heard

Quote #1800 (+5) [ 2004-04-04, 14:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

* zenman 's real penis is twice as big as all of your, who gives a shit about epenis
<notbh> zenman: 4 inches? whoa thats huge
<notbh> :P
<@VooDoo> mines only 3"
<nwatts> oh, and all you are real mature
<@VooDoo> but my wife likes it that wide
<zenman> ha ha ha

Quote #3454 (+2) [ 2006-07-18, 18:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

* FatMan runs his hands through his hair and wonders what the hell to do upgrade-wise
< FatMan> so out of touch with all this new fandangled computer hardware stuff
<@Bern|PuB> have you considered going blonde FatMan?

Quote #98 (+6) [ 2002-11-20, 01:46 ] [ + | - | X ]

<reverb`> wet the end the just jerk it right?

Quote #156 (+12) [ 2002-12-11, 11:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rudeboi> /msg Z@channels.oz.org login Rudeboi 297411
<Rudeboi> bah - fuck
<l00b3r> lol
<WhiteyFord> lmao
<Narcolepsy> ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
<WhiteyFord> hahahahahaha
<Erve> OMFG ROFL
* l00b3r takes over Rudeboi