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Quote #380 (+9) [ 2003-03-06, 17:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Vindictive> I bag the big screw!
<Darkness> You want to get laid by a fat chick?
<Forraje> it's fun until your friends find out
<Darkness> or someone looses an eye.... or their pelvic bone.

Quote #1159 (+1) [ 2003-10-18, 08:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Chemix) i'd join one of those alien religions, then when their not looking, i'd steal the aliens computer.
(Chemix) if that alien can use his computer for calculating space travel, could you imagine the fps you'd get in quake3

Quote #3202 (+10) [ 2006-01-16, 12:58 ] [ + | - | X ]

<SolidRed> i shot lazers from my eyes during sex
<SolidRed> its an annoying power

Quote #2802 (+3) [ 2005-05-31, 09:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Strange1> It was a slow news day for Ray Martin the other day "The bad manners epidemic sweeping the nation, Pregnent woman and even the elderly cant get a seat on a bus"
<Strange1> I shit you not
<TheWedgie> ROFL
<TheWedgie> i saw that
<Strange1> That was the main story
<TheWedgie> next day i pushed a pregnant woman OFF the bus.
<Strange1> I pushed one infront of a bus
<TheWedgie> "Ray Martin told me to do it!
<TheWedgie> hahaha
<TheWedgie> you win.

Quote #2722 (+1) [ 2005-04-29, 02:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Retz> What do you prefer between your legs going 100 miles an hour; your bike or your wife
<Retz> Dont ask me how thats related, but...
<@Agg> my wife between my legs? uh, you need to watch more porn or have someone draw you a diagram or something.

Quote #2641 (0) [ 2005-03-24, 00:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> yeah, that'll impress my wife.. "honey, wake up, i tore a chunk out of my arse with a bottle of guinness, can you drive to the hospital while i lie face-down on the roof-rack.. ta"

Quote #1470 (+14) [ 2004-01-02, 00:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<gords> SMS from Tom: I have broken down outside an open access point again!!
<D_Web> lmao
<wildz0r> bwahahaha
<wildz0r> get him on IRC!
<gords> "No we are outside *** and it is http only"
<D_Web> ahhahaha
<gords> i replied with something like "lol, *** has an open ap? heh. btw, you really should replace the commo if you don't want to be broken down all the time. waiting for the racv?"
<gords> his reply: "yes bloody alternator"

Quote #4341 (+2) [ 2008-06-30, 14:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

< Radar> Fuck waking the dog for a joke
<@Agg> i hope you missed an l there and not an n

Quote #2191 (-1) [ 2004-07-26, 21:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

<magey> accidently backed car into a gate
<magey> SIgh
<FatMan> see, your mistake was not turning on no clipping mode

Quote #4258 (-2) [ 2007-12-23, 12:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ace234> i plan on sleeping most of christmas, have to work the night before
<outy> im going to bed to practice sleeping for christmas day
<outy> it was the night before christmas and all though the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. ace234 had to work that day and fuck it was shit, wishing mrs clause would show him her tits

Quote #1436 (+5) [ 2003-12-12, 02:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Reaver> okay guys, WTF! I just turned off my PC to install a new HDD, while I'm doing it I hear a bang, sounds like metal against metal though I didn't see anything move!
<Reaver> any ideas?
<Erve> you blew the welds on your intake manifold

Quote #4126 (-1) [ 2007-05-24, 10:16 ] [ + | - | X ]

<freaek> so this morning I went and picked up my van. Had to get a new alternator put in, which cost me the princely sum of $661. I asked the bloke if the fucken thing came with a steak dinner and a happy ending
<freaek> he didn't seem impressed

Quote #4200 (-6) [ 2007-08-19, 15:31 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Mibba> HAY GUYS
<Mibba> I JUST GOT LAID
<Mibba> by my hand
<Mibba> its called, talleh
<Gamma> Mibba NO WAY
<Gamma> thats 3 people, and im not one of them NOT FAIR
<Gamma> :(
<Mibba> 3 people?
<Ze> Gamma : you want to get laid by Talleh?
* Gamma hides
<Gamma> i said nothing Mibba NOTHING
<Gamma> forget what i said
<Ze> yeah forget about FatMan :p
<Gamma> Ze i'd sink so low now it aint funny

Quote #201 (0) [ 2002-12-24, 04:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Madhatter> and did u mortage your bodily organs to buy a rock or two :p
<Mred32> No. The bank didnt want them...:/
<Madhatter> lol
<Madhatter> always the black market :)
<Mred32> I just slutted myself on the street for a few hours and the money poured in.
<Madhatter> your lucky you didnt have to give her 3 rings!
<Mred32> She came with two built in.......
<Tri> LOL
* Mred32 looks over his shoulder....
<Mred32> that was close....

Quote #4353 (+3) [ 2008-07-27, 21:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<sg> HAI
<Tank> HAI
<@Wayne> HAI
<Tank> HAI
<glasnt> BAI
<@Wayne> NAI
<@Sniper9300> WAI
<Tank> YAI
<SirPNut> anyway, night guys
<@Wayne> GAI
<brodsta> NOWAI
<@Agg> FISH
<@Agg> wait, what

Quote #1469 (+4) [ 2003-12-31, 14:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Firemoth> Hmm, I think I'll send a postcard to my new sponser child. :D
<Agg-> postcard of what?
<Agg-> send him a picture of a big juicy steak.
<Agg-> man, i'm so going to hell.
<Gibbon> Half Eaten

Quote #2932 (+4) [ 2005-08-12, 23:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

<D_Web> we ordered 150 pizzas at uni today
<FreeFrag> lol
<eDust> lol D_Web, did they send a fleet of scooters to deliver?
<eDust> an armada of scooters
<knowsfords> did you kill one of the scooter drivers then go back to the pizza place to get delivery missions?

Quote #670 (+7) [ 2003-06-15, 10:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<BamBam> Sole is going to hit some. :P
<SoleSurvivor> Speaking of that.
<SoleSurvivor> I was watching porn yesterday with 6 guys and 1 girl.
<SoleSurvivor> Never again.
<SoleSurvivor> I felt so....gay.
<Rowin-Dincht> SoleSurvivor; what the hell did you expect, to feel all happy and tingly inside
<BamBam> You know they were just hoping the could oops into each other.
<damn> Solesurvivor... how did you get the girl to watch it?

Quote #4245 (+5) [ 2007-11-18, 22:20 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Bern> I had king Prawns and coopers for dinner... nice, simple and delicious
<Agg> i finished off a cab merlot earlier, smack :)
<brodsta> We had some seafood salad thing with lobster and scallops
<smack> well done
<TankTop> i had sausages :<

Quote #1581 (+6) [ 2004-02-01, 22:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<BoobooKittiFukk> a pom in one of the tour groups we took in paris
<BoobooKittiFukk> asked me if a taz devil really spun around like that

Quote #3056 (+6) [ 2005-10-30, 20:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<VooDoo> Agg: i had a race with a guy on a bike the other day
<VooDoo> Aprilla 2 stroke thing. I destroyed him :D
<Agg> you destroyed his mighty 125 or 250cc engine.. go you :)

Quote #2786 (0) [ 2005-05-26, 03:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Mred32 is now known as Mred|sick
<Mred|sick> ohh my poor belly
<Mred|sick> ...and my poor toilet
<Mred|sick> I really feel like I want to fart, but I'm scared to
<Mred|sick> I'm gonna go to bed instead.
<Mred|sick> night
<outon|sick> Mred|sick its time like that i just go to bed, whatever happens, happens, if anyone asks you were asleep
<Mred|sick> I share a bed. Its not so simple
<outon|sick> yeah im gonna crawl into bed, i feel like shit
<Mred|sick> night
<outon|sick> Mred|sick, stick with your story, "i was asleep, i didnt know i sharted everwhere"
<One``> She will wake up with 80s themed clothes.

Quote #1677 (+2) [ 2004-02-23, 01:14 ] [ + | - | X ]

<WoobiE> wee, some guy killed 2 people a few hours ago 20km from me, fled on a quad
<nwatts> :|
<WoobiE> his ex-girlfriend and her young daughter.. nice guy
* PolishMani has quit IRC (Quit)
<nwatts> hrmm
<nwatts> i hate death
<WoobiE> yeah.. that guy is a prick
<nwatts> did you known him personally?
<WoobiE> weve had drinks a few times, but that black hood and reap give me the creeps
<nwatts> hahah
<nwatts> funny man

Quote #823 (+7) [ 2003-07-28, 14:37 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Eroda> noone love me :(
<sabretooth> Nup.
<sabretooth> Feel the unlove.
<biatch> that's ok Eroda, i'll unlove you
* Lurks feels sabretooth's unlove
<Iroquois> err
<Rik|busy> hmmm
<sabretooth> Unhhh.
* Rik|busy runs away
<sabretooth> How about you don't
<Lurks> shit thats going to get chopped
* Lurks waits for the OCAU Topic Surgeon to arrive
<Rik|busy> it's a rather topical conversation...
<sabretooth> Someone's probably at smokeyou right now.
<Lurks> yeah and it is probally you
<sabretooth> I'd rather not have a record of that, personally. :)

Quote #922 (+1) [ 2003-08-18, 17:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

<aCeNospell> i had better my skill
<echelon> you had better your typing :P
<aCeNospell> i that too,

Quote #3363 (+3) [ 2006-05-12, 01:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FatMan> i'm not bitter about movies inaccurately portraying tech stuff.
<FatMan> i don't hate myself for doing engineering.
* FatMan taps gun to head
<aftahours> lol
<FatMan> i'm off to play russian roulette with myself. goodnight.
<FatMan> i swear, fuck razors. real self-destructive people do engineeirng.
<Rage> :S
* bullet has joined #overclockers
<Rage> oh, thats really poor timing bullet.
<aftahours> LOL
* aftahours falls off chair
<FatMan> hahahahaha

Quote #4300 (0) [ 2008-04-19, 21:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<The_Dan> I love UGBox
<The_Dan> I really really do

Quote #884 (+4) [ 2003-08-12, 10:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<NozzUni> breaky?
<Erve> the most important meal of the day
<echelon> until lunchtime that is

Quote #1563 (+3) [ 2004-01-29, 01:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> eating coco pops with coke on them, watching Wombat and the Curiousity Show.. I miss those days. and my teeth.

Quote #1461 (+5) [ 2003-12-28, 16:20 ] [ + | - | X ]

<mazzanet> Agg-: oh and i need a cronjob
<FreeFrag> dont be rude :o
<Agg-> jeez, you could at least buy me dinner first

Quote #2097 (+10) [ 2004-06-30, 18:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<wild> I hate cheap power tools.
* Erve has joined #channel
<Rik> speaking of cheap tools
<Erve> I'm cheap and quick.
<Rik> blow too soon
<Erve> and easy to replace

Quote #1572 (+2) [ 2004-01-31, 20:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Z3LL) mm i bet theres some tranny dude in this channel reading all our sit
(Z3LL) *shit
(Vassili) errr wtf?

Quote #3927 (-7) [ 2006-12-24, 23:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

<biatch> I carry the one house key on me - the flyscreen key - because it's the only doors that are locked.
<myne> hahaha biatch end it now
<myne> if you top your own idiot list
<biatch> Okay, so, going out to dinner and I decide I'd better shut the sliding glass doors just incase!
<myne> you've got nothing left
<biatch> The rest of my house keys are in the car. They're never used
<Sniper165> and you didnt take a sliding door key
<biatch> Bingo!
<biatch> It was in the car.
<biatch> The fucking CAR keys were in the HOUSE
<Deanodrvr> damn
<outy> hahaha
<outy> biatch said fucking
<brod|afk> lol
<biatch> I couldn't get into the house because the keys were in the car, and I couldn't get in the car because those fuckers were in the house!
<outy> what did you do?
<myne> scream like a banshee I suspect
<outy> should have waited for santa, that bastard will sneak in ya chimney

Quote #1657 (+8) [ 2004-02-18, 21:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Wolff> how sad is it... im eating canned food and drinking passion pop, while my house mate is drinkin smirnoff double black and eating chinese :D

Quote #588 (+5) [ 2003-05-22, 23:36 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Manaz> The Barton core must give head when its not busy or something if it's really that good.

Quote #4249 (+2) [ 2007-12-03, 23:09 ] [ + | - | X ]

<fen> You learn something new everyday.. today i learnt that the governemnt can jail you and take your wages/house/drivers license/car if you dont pay a parking fine for 4 months. It all nicely laid out in the enforcement order they mailed me saying payup by 22nd of december or your fucked.
<Stygian> hah
* GSlicer has quit (Ping timeout)
* BTC is now known as BedTC|Zzz
* lurks2 is now known as Lurks
<fen> i think i'll pay it now..

Quote #1171 (+1) [ 2003-10-19, 05:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

* biatch spanks sabretooth
<biatch> rowr :)
* sabretooth spanks biatch back.
<Iroquois> get a chan, you two :P

Quote #572 (+6) [ 2003-05-18, 10:02 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Frag|Sleep hands Malbert a nice fresh shit
<Malbert> mmm
<Frag|Sleep> tasty?
<Malbert> like a bbq chicken

Quote #38 (-1) [ 2002-10-28, 07:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Baker|DDR> Anyways, back to playing half naked ddr

Quote #1808 (+4) [ 2004-04-06, 22:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> ask!
<DDsD> How long is TheWedgie's Penis Rage?
<Rage> flaccid or erect?
<TheWedgie> :/
<DDsD> Ahh.. both
<Rage> 4" flaccid
<Rage> 7" errect
<TheWedgie> longer than the third toe on my left foot.
<DDsD> <Rage> lol, my gf thinks i'm gay
<TheWedgie> LOL
<DDsD> I think that *thinks* is the wrong word dude ;p

Quote #1241 (+1) [ 2003-10-29, 11:14 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Refle}{> i lost $4 in a vending machine and i'm getting it back today lol ..they are going to COURIER it back to me ..
<Chamelion> heh
<Stokesy> hah
<orlock> Refle}{: should have asked them to send you what it was you wanted instead
<echelon> Refle}{: What I want to know, was why you thought "Hrm, I just lost my $2 coin in the vending machine. I know! I'll put in another!"
<Refle}{> yeh they're getting some chocky bars for me as well ..and echelon thats pretty much what happened :D .. except that i was putting the second one in to follow the first down and push it out lol
<echelon> haha
<echelon> brains :P
<Refle}{> i know eh ..
<yale_work> heh
<yale_work> the machine at work eats your money sometimes, they just tell us to get fucked
* yale_work rocks the machine to set the tilt sensor off when he's on his way home from work now
<yale_work> that'll teach 'em

Quote #939 (-19) [ 2003-08-21, 00:55 ] [ + | - | X ]

<andY1> dunno if i just did a bad thing....
<andY1> boss just rang me, and i told him to go fuck himself

Quote #2851 (+4) [ 2005-06-27, 10:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Radar> Heh, our goldfish have been sexing each other
<outonanisl> lol
<outonanisl> how can you tell ?
<Mnz|WORK> the male's smoking, the female has a disappointed look on her face...

Quote #2308 (+7) [ 2004-09-28, 22:10 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Junkz> only 2 things smell like fish
<Junkz> and one of them is fish

Quote #2270 (+7) [ 2004-09-01, 19:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Falkor): nice. vaginal thrush ads
(brembo`): put them around dinner time too, Brilliant!
(Rage): brilliant!

Quote #2403 (-2) [ 2004-11-30, 19:09 ] [ + | - | X ]

<aftahours> Agg when I search the news archives for 'crack', how come most of the articles don't have crack in them?
<aftahours> hmm, that might of sounded confusing
<Agg> stop ogling my crack, aftahours

Quote #3491 (0) [ 2006-08-04, 22:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

* pipsqeek watched 40 year old virgin last week. what a freakin hilariously wrong movie. I loved it.
<Mornx> I know a 40 year old virgin on another channel
<Mornx> he said it was accurate

Quote #1183 (0) [ 2003-10-21, 07:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

(james-2): I don't use a virus scanner either
(tensop): james-: mind if i email you a little program i mate
(tensop): its called notavirus.vbs

Quote #1534 (+4) [ 2004-01-18, 23:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> sciby's a master at playing with himself
<Agg> errm, sabretooth.
<sabretooth> Yeah... back in your box

Quote #2048 (+7) [ 2004-06-08, 20:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> how does one withdraw $10k cash?
<Rage> take a breifcase up to the bank?
<Erve> ask for a bank cheque?
<Falkor> or get a bank cheque
<Crudmuffin> yeah, bank cheque
<Erve> maybe a bank cheque?
<Rage> perhaps a bank cheque...
<Rik> I'd say bank cheque
<Fod> i was thinking you could try a bank cheque
<Fod> that's just my opinion though
<Erve> Survey says
<Erve> bank cheque
<FreeFrag> I might ask for my loan in cash.
<Fod> oh try and be at least a little original freefrag