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Quote #723 (+1) [ 2003-07-04, 01:09 ] [ + | - | X ]

<bundy> i did gender studies this semester because it was full of girls.. then i realised they were all feminists

Quote #1869 (+7) [ 2004-04-24, 00:16 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@Borg[W]> whats good about working 18hr days ?
<nwatts> money
<chunksoul> the money
<DJ-Studd> Borg: Money? :D
<WMinstrel> Money.
<Alyra>money!
<BenX>MONEY!

Quote #1694 (+4) [ 2004-02-26, 16:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

(afromonster06) i need a blow job any takers?
Thrill puts hand up ;)
afromonster06 looks for any but thrill
(Thrill)lol
(afromonster06)Thrill it looks like u r the winna
Thrill says It's true what they tell me afromonster06. You can take the man out of the farm but you cant take the farm out of the man!!!! Now get off that sheep afromonster06
afromonster06 is not from new zealand
(Thrill)ahahaha
afromonster06 grabs a kangaroo and does it aussie style

Quote #2031 (+7) [ 2004-06-05, 22:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<D_Web> what did the bachelor of arts student say to the bachelor of engineering student?
<D_Web> Would you like fries with that?
<Erve> what did Erve say to D_Web?
<Erve> old :P

Quote #1924 (+7) [ 2004-05-06, 18:42 ] [ + | - | X ]

<brembo`> we got a delivery of magazines to work today
<brembo`> they were meant to be 'English Womans Weekly', we got pron mags

Quote #1386 (+7) [ 2003-11-27, 12:35 ] [ + | - | X ]

<CapnChron> Man.. I hate it when my mum is home
<yale_work> CapnChron, can't fuck your sister on the kitchen bench?
<CapnChron> lol
<CapnChron> no, even worse!
<CapnChron> Mum's bed!

Quote #4101 (+4) [ 2007-04-30, 22:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

* dana passes everyone knives
<dana> and scissors
<dana> and a toaster
<dana> now run!

Quote #1377 (+10) [ 2003-11-25, 15:37 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ace234> defiant_wench: I smoked pot for a month one night

Quote #1405 (+8) [ 2003-11-30, 23:43 ] [ + | - | X ]

<biatch> I'll convert u GooSE. I want to sex your brains out you hot motherfucker.
* GooSE looks down
<GooSE> Geez dude, you've got such a small wang
<biatch> shutup and keep licking

Quote #1787 (+14) [ 2004-03-29, 22:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> cmon, you slow pos.
* knowsfords punches his modem
* knowsfords - Quit (Quit: connection reset by peer)

Quote #36 (+3) [ 2002-10-28, 04:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Narcolepsy> I used to get a sore right wrist, but for some reason, but new chair fixed it...
<Narcolepsy> I guess I can sit at a better height now..
<VooDoo> swap hands Narcolepsy
<Narcolepsy> VooDoo: Changing hands is like a whole new woman...

Quote #1853 (+6) [ 2004-04-17, 22:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> * Nozzette is now known as Nozz <--another sex change funded by medicare >:-(
<Falkor> i NEED IT

Quote #2718 (+2) [ 2005-04-28, 10:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

[ canadiant]: Im in love lol. I found a girl that can subnet! :D

Quote #4317 (+5) [ 2008-05-13, 21:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Navillus> I work for the Ausindustry hotline - LPG Rebates and the like
<Rezin> no
* SirPNut kicks Navillus in the junk
<Navillus> Anyone want to pore through the budget so I know how bad my day is going to be tommorrow?
<SirPNut> the rebate's been scrapped
<SirPNut> you're fired.

Quote #4220 (+1) [ 2007-10-07, 21:55 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Broady> groupwork is stupid
<Broady> my group atm, one guy has the database, and hasnt come online, its due on thursday
<brodsta> haha
<glasnt> They make you do groupwork so at job interviews you have an answer too "Tell us about a time when you had to work in a group, but really wanted to kill your group members in their sleep. What was the situation, and what weapon would you use?"

Quote #2681 (+6) [ 2005-04-13, 12:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

[12:15] [ betanumeri]: yes Ultimata
[12:17] [ betanumeri]: how come everyone stops when i talk
[12:17] [ Ultimata]: dunno, maybe its your breath? :P
[12:17] [ betanumeri]: nope aint my breath and i ment on irc
[12:19] [ Hayden]: smelly fingers

Quote #15 (+6) [ 2002-10-23, 06:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Zardoz> I want to get my penis working but I really have no idea how to use it either.
<Skit> people use it, becomes unstable..

Quote #2645 (+6) [ 2005-03-25, 13:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

<David> you know what tastes nice?
<David> golden circle sars cordial, mixed with cola :p
<David> instead of putting water with the cordial, just add cola :p
<Milton> I think I will forgo the diabetes cocktail, thanks

Quote #1451 (+10) [ 2003-12-25, 22:14 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> mmm, 2 hour walk with chicks > *
<Tommmo> how's your mum anyway rage ?

Quote #2669 (+10) [ 2005-04-05, 19:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jedi_Vader20> bit of amusement from class today: Our teacher was discussing our group assignments. "Now for your groups, three is a good number, two is too few, four is too much." (someone mutters from across the room) "three shall be the number of counting, and the number of counting shall be three." (giggling) "five is right out!" (class cracks up)

Quote #795 (+4) [ 2003-07-16, 19:43 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Infra|Gone> talk to my butt, cause the face aint listening
<Carrots> infra, they are easy to mistake for one another

Quote #1994 (+8) [ 2004-05-23, 15:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Banks> how much is it for a 30 dollar recharge?

Quote #1888 (+10) [ 2004-04-28, 01:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<PolishMani> i didnt think it would be this hard to find a foos ball table in Australia...an el cheapo one
<@Agg> I pity the foos.

Quote #1114 (+5) [ 2003-10-12, 02:32 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Iroquois> Caffeine and CRT rays = no sleep.
* INerTIal nods
<Erwino> Iroquois - crt r gay buy an lcd
<Iroquois> I frequently catch my monitor slipping out in the night for man-sex.
<INerTIal> lmao
<clockit> no way CRT's rock
<Erwino> lol
<Erwino> monitor man-sex lol
<chubba> lol
<MadHatter> you watch your monitor having "man-sex" ?
<clockit> i dont take caffeine but im awake at 2:30am, but i usaually wake up around 3pm
<Erwino> gives me an image of agg in my head :(
<MadHatter> LOL!
<clockit> lol
<clockit> bannage
<Agg> Erwino - seek help :)

Quote #2507 (+1) [ 2005-01-16, 23:31 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Flora> So I want to make arrangements and what not
<Flora> How do I do that without a phone!?
<Lartnec> Carrier pigeon.
<Flora> I don't know their address :(
<Lartnec> Send alot of carrier pigeons

Quote #160 (+8) [ 2002-12-13, 03:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sticks> FUCK them - they want equality, then they can have the same rights as EVERYONE
<Sticks> forget I said that
<Sticks> wrong channel for that talk
*** Sticks was kicked by Z ((Sticks) Twit)

Quote #2013 (+5) [ 2004-05-30, 13:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fodzilla> any of you guys know Perl?
<Erve> yeah I know her.
<Erve> seen her around sometimes
<eDust> i hate Perl
<eDust> she's ugly
<@Crudmuffin> Not only is she ugly, she's a bitch to get along with
<@Crudmuffin> Occasionally she's nice, but then she just cracks it and it takes you a lifetime to get everything kosher again.

Quote #3138 (+10) [ 2005-12-13, 23:42 ] [ + | - | X ]

Shard2: woah that was close.
Shard2: i was outside hanging my clothes up and i heard a thud. thought a leb had thrown a bomb over my fence but it was just a plum falling off the tree. i almost got stabbed.

Quote #438 (+3) [ 2003-03-31, 21:35 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Mystro|T|> any one know any good channels on EFnet to get movies??
<Narc|LAG> #gaymansexformystro
<Enfilade> Nah, #funkybuttlovingformystro is better
<Groomy> theres noone in those channels :(

Quote #2605 (+10) [ 2005-02-22, 20:26 ] [ + | - | X ]

<pov> ..
<pov> "LAST NIGHT A DJ SAVED MY LIFE!!! LAST NIGHT A DJ SAVED MY LIFE!!! FROM A BROAKEN HEART!..
<pov> ..last night the dj blew my mind... last night the dj came on time.."
* pov sets mode: +boogie
<pov> :D

Quote #1269 (+2) [ 2003-11-03, 04:23 ] [ + | - | X ]

<thetron> soon they will design planes with no wings
<Fod> and watch them drop out of the sky
<Fod> that'll be a short-lived experiment
<thetron> Fod these are futuristic planes
<Fod> the wings are what keep it in the air
<Fod> you either need wings, or downwards pointing engines, like a helicopters or a harrier
<Fod> or maybe a magical arse

Quote #366 (+4) [ 2003-03-02, 00:10 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@BladeCA> i dont think i have a good enough connection to play online either
* BladeCA (Blade_CA_@CPE-202-43-1-217.spiderweb.com.au) Quit (Ping timeout)
* BladeCA (Blade_CA_@CPE-202-43-1-126.spiderweb.com.au) has joined #anomaly
* Z sets mode: +o BladeCA
<@LoneWolf_> obviously not :)

Quote #2603 (+5) [ 2005-02-22, 13:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<MonoAWAY> Hi! I'm Bram Cohen, the author of BitTorrent.
<MonoAWAY> I maintain BitTorrent for a living. This is my only job.
<MonoAWAY> Brian, you're gonna starve...
<MonoAWAY> *Bram
<Shawry> Hi! I am Brum, an obnoxious little british car. I have my own television series

Quote #3051 (+2) [ 2005-10-28, 09:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

oli: any car knowledgable people here?
Grosby: what do you need to know about a car?
oli: ive got a car sitting in the driveway with a jack under one side, and two piles of bricks on the other
oli: a monaro
oli: :(
Grosby: You live in Ipswich?

Quote #1757 (+12) [ 2004-03-22, 14:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Falkor> hmm this packet of apricot logs has a use by date of Feb 05, 4047 ?
<knowsfords> man they really mean it when they say foil seals in the freshness

Quote #3110 (+5) [ 2005-11-27, 16:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

(modafroman) anyone got a spare blue ccfl they wanna give me?
(Ultimata) modafroman, rice from Woolies is cheaper.

Quote #3612 (+18) [ 2006-10-23, 22:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jessica> Agg: I only just saw your "ohmly" pun, and fuck you. I groaned.
<Agg> Jessica - pfft, you've got to stay more current than that.
<Jessica> OH GOD
<Agg> watt?
<aftahours> lol
<sabretooth> I'm here, I'm here
<Jessica> I'm vomiting groans all over the place.
<Agg> my work here is done.
<Agg> (potentially)
* thetron gives Agg a medal
<Jessica> Agg: One of my friends has the following to say
<Jessica> "I laughed really hard at the "watt". That was shockingly good."
<Jessica> me: "SHUT UP"
<Agg> hehe
<Jessica> him: "Sorry, I didn't mean to jolt you like that "
<Agg> tell him to stop arcing on about it.
<Jessica> Me too. People think I'm so down to earth, then bam. Puns.
<TheWedgie> bit of a humour brownout there Agg.
<sabretooth> Oh no.
<Jessica> People think I'm so down to earth, then bam. Puns.
<Jessica> ..yeah.
<Agg> yes, i had an alternate, but i decided to be more direct.
<Jessica> you two need to get a fucking room.
<sabretooth> Everyone, LOOK AWAY
<Jessica> "I'll be generating these things for a while"
<TheWedgie> i guess you could really socket to em though.
* Agg averts his gaze
<Jin-Jah> Agg you're a shocker
<sabretooth> The pun-o-meter's going off the scale
<Jessica> "He oughta be charged for that one"
<sabretooth> Ohh, very good. But GROAN.
<Jessica> "I mean, it had a lot of potential"
<TheWedgie> Jessica - still plugging away eh..
<sabretooth> Agg, she's starting to outpun you.
<Turophile> :)
<Agg> hey, i already used potential! you've blown it, buddy!
<sabretooth> The puns are discharging all over the place.
<Jessica> Really?
<Agg> what are you, anode?
* BTC chases the puns all over the place
<BTC> whoop whoop whoop
<sabretooth> Agg, it was induced out of me.
<aftahours> agg can't resist.
<Asteroid> well that sure sent the conversation flat
<Ashley> IRC: Outlet for insanity.
<sabretooth> I nearly diode.
<aftahours> lol
<TheWedgie> hahahaha
<Agg> it's ok, i've nearly discharged my capacity.
<Asteroid> ooh, resistance
<Turophile> IRC: Outlet of my insanity, inlet of others.
* aftahours steals agg's pot
<sabretooth> Hey I used discharge!
<Jin-Jah> nice triode at a final attempt there
<sabretooth> I'll have to pop a cap in yo ass.
<Asteroid> ooh subtly afta :)
<Agg> i blame Jessica. she LED us all astray.
<V8R[hm]> heh
<Jessica> alrighty
<Bern> YOU lot are revolting
<Asteroid> just cause Agg'solder than us!
<sabretooth> Clearly, she could have short circuited the whole thing and passed this whole mess
<thetron> Bern: Sorry mr sexy pants
<aftahours> <Asteroid> just cause Agg'solder than us! <-- lmao
<sabretooth> Bern: thetron wasn't energised by your pun, clearly.
<TheWedgie> you two sure are generating a lot of puns...
<Agg> we're all a bit excited.
<V8R[hm]> man, you guys are on fire.. my side hertz from the lol
* Shaun rocks out to AC/DC
<Shadey> lol
<Bern> sabretooth: his reply has left me flat
<Asteroid> i used that one
<BradR|Lap> heh
* V8R[hm] gives Bern a wave
* thetron wonders where the world is i386 camera 1 is now
<Agg> and i don't mean to be negative.. but i've got to go to the bank and repay what cathode.
* Asteroid sines out
* Agg bows out
* sabretooth sines a few autographs.
<Asteroid> stop being such squares
<Agg> don't be so inverse.
<BradR|Lap> heh
<V8R[hm]> this is looking terminal
<Cypher`> how far away is the bank as the CRO flys?
<V8R[hm]> lol
<Asteroid> i could cut the tension in here with a sawtooth
<Jin-Jah> hahaha
<BTC> The name is Baud......, James Baud...
<sabretooth> Agg, I don't like your conduct.
<V8R[hm]> try Asteroid, much HT in here
<BradR|Lap> some people are showing really odd sines in here
<BradR|Lap> im worried
<Agg> sabretooth - i'm not here to shroud you from interference.
<BradR|Lap> resistance is futile!
* Asteroid equips RF sheilding
<sabretooth> Agg, but I'll only be here faraday.
* Asteroid transforms
<BTC> Disinformation is not as good as datinformation
<Agg> sabretooth - put it away, fermi.
<Shadey> HAHA
<V8R[hm]> all your base, Asteroid...
<Asteroid> what you say?
<sabretooth> I'm feeling pretty polarised by the whole thing.
* Asteroid PICs up his socks
* Bern calls the coppers
<kelwyn> quit while youre still ahead, sunshine
<sabretooth> Bern: maybe they can amp it up a bit
<Turophile> I'll awp you.
<Bern> I'm sure they can trace the source of the breakout sabretooth
<sabretooth> Damn, I think I'm punned out.
<Shadey> haha
<TheWedgie> suffered a pun blackout sabretooth?
<falkor> sabretooth, i find that impossible to believe
<kelwyn> sabretooth, i told you to quit while you were ahead
<sabretooth> The whole thing's been rather electrifying.
<Bern> if you meditate you can recharge your pun bank
<Turophile> Asteroid: Difuse?
<Turophile> Asteroid: I'll Hue/Saturate you in a minute =
<Bern> follow after me... Ohmmmm, Ohmmm
<sabretooth> I'm quite fluxed.
<Bern> Solder on sabretooth, solder on
<sabretooth> That was used :p
<sabretooth> You shouldn't oscillate around the same words.
<kelwyn> sabretooth stop
<sabretooth> The way you flyback to the same old words just doesn't work!
<kelwyn> you;re getting painful to watch
<sabretooth> Gah!
<sabretooth> But the frequency of the puns is increasing!
<kelwyn> sabz, dont be that guy.
<sabretooth> hEMF. Okay, I'll stop.
* kelwyn stabs sabre

Quote #1184 (+2) [ 2003-10-21, 17:22 ] [ + | - | X ]

<smokey> pussy smells
<SUPAMODEL> especially when it's been dead for like 2, 3 days dude

Quote #2097 (+10) [ 2004-06-30, 18:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<wild> I hate cheap power tools.
* Erve has joined #channel
<Rik> speaking of cheap tools
<Erve> I'm cheap and quick.
<Rik> blow too soon
<Erve> and easy to replace

Quote #2029 (+12) [ 2004-06-05, 13:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fod> "shepparton has tractors, so it's one up on the amish"

Quote #3246 (+6) [ 2006-02-10, 16:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

-!- Bostik has joined...
<Bostik> well, that was the stupidest thing i have done in a while
<Bostik> i applied for a job while high
<Rara_Avis> lol
<Rara_Avis> how'd it go?
<Bostik> i knew it was going to go badly. the first thing i did once i got to Burnside was walk into a glass door.

Quote #4030 (+13) [ 2007-02-03, 05:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Ambush> Get a camera guy to follow you while you break into the houses in your neighbourhood
<Ambush> I'll do the sound
<outy> hahaha
<Ambush> It'll be like the opposite of "Cops"
<FatMan> "Robbers"?

Quote #2704 (+6) [ 2005-04-23, 13:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yaleman> some guy in a wheelchair got hit by a taxi in the valley the other day
<yaleman> was rolling around yelling " I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs!"
<CapnChron> hahahahahahahaha
<yaleman> well, the first bit is true, the second half I added for funny value

Quote #3606 (+4) [ 2006-10-18, 14:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<The_Dan> fuckin hell
<The_Dan> sneezed and gave myself some kind of crazy pain
<The_Dan> behind me eye
<The_Dan> nyar
<Turophile> The_Dan: Brain trying to escape?
<WedgieAFK> haha

Quote #699 (+13) [ 2003-06-25, 22:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Quilb shakes head at the level of conversation. its not even 2am yet
* Darkness puts hand to ear. And this just in, Fuck you, Quilb. Thanks, tom!

Quote #3357 (+7) [ 2006-05-06, 19:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Shaun> I do believe my pizza is on fire.

Quote #3314 (+10) [ 2006-04-04, 22:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Kingy> biatch - but there are plenty of things girls can't do.
<biatch> For sure.
<biatch> Like squish my spiders, Kingy
<Jessica> I don't squish spiders
<Jessica> I grab a chinese food container and take them outside :)
<biatch> I have serious deep-seated issues with spiders, Jessica
<Jessica> I like 'em.
<Jessica> Except redbacks they can just die
<biatch> I'd like to be able to take them outside, but the instant I see one I involuntarily go into serious panic mode
<biatch> I'd LIKE to be able to stay calm and think rationally
<biatch> But serious panic!
<Agg> biatch - the trick is to not think about them on you. don't focus on the feeling of the hairs on their thick legs brushing against your skin, the tiny gripping parts on the ends of their legs latching onto your flesh, their many reflective eyes watching your every move above broad, twitching, glistening fangs.
<Agg> then you'll be fine.
<TheWedgie> lmao Agg, you bastard
<saboteur> hahaha agg
<biatch> Thanks for that, Agg. :) I'll sleep well tonight!

Quote #1162 (+2) [ 2003-10-19, 12:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Frag|A> neolithic, CANCEL IT QUICK
<Frag|A> IT'S INSTALLING MAC OS 10.2.7
<neolithic> nooooooooooooooooooo
* neolithic explodes
<Frag|A> NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOU'LL BE REDUCED TO BEING A N00B WITH A SINGLE MOUSE BUTTON
<neolithic> the fucker wont quit!

Quote #279 (+7) [ 2003-01-23, 04:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg-> maybe
<Agg-> you
<Agg-> could
<Agg-> look
<Agg-> for
<Agg-> a
<Agg-> keyboard
<Agg-> that
<Agg-> doesn't
<Agg-> hit
<Agg-> return
<risesies> Agg- you spammer :P
<Agg-> instead
<Agg-> of
<Agg-> space
<Agg-> so kick me
* Agg- was kicked by Wolfy (dont spam!)

Quote #404 (+3) [ 2003-03-18, 05:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fodder> just tell them you're giggling about a pinata filled with dead kittens
<cSmith> i am too buddy :P