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Quote #4153 (+1) [ 2007-06-07, 19:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sunset> ffs i was at work tonight till 6:30pm for a hung jury :(
<Torched> how do you know they were hung?

Quote #76 (+5) [ 2002-11-15, 06:37 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Wolff cuddles telstra

Quote #4284 (+6) [ 2008-03-17, 17:45 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Tensop-z> http://www.nissan-global.com/EN/NEWS/2008/_STORY/080314-02-01.jpg
<Tensop-z> anyone else notice the font and bold thing is identical to old ms software
<Tensop-z> Microsoft safety car :)
<+Nick> probably crash before the cars do

Quote #2082 (+11) [ 2004-06-26, 17:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<eDust> this morning i went downstairs to tell the building manager my airconditioner's not working and he had some cute girl there with him (works for the same company) and she was saying the whole building's the same, they're all not working, and i think she was there to keep people happy
<eDust> you can't get angry with a good looking girl like that
<@gords> haha
<@D_Web> hahaha
<WedgieDC> lol
<eDust> and she said it's getting fixed monday, and i'm thinking, what? how can i survive without airconditioning, but she's smiling heaps... so i just walked away smiling

Quote #3030 (+8) [ 2005-10-17, 20:20 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Hunter> um :O :S :(~~~ :brokenheart: :drooping rose: :angry: :phone:
<Hunter> apparently thats what im like after chicks
<BenZApple> you give head... with a funny lip pattern, then dribble, then break her heart, come impotent, get angry, and shane warne rings?

Quote #2583 (+3) [ 2005-02-13, 23:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Warhamster> hmm... instead of going to my schools swimming carnival and watching all the hot girls in my grade wandering around in bikinis, i'm going to stay home, play counterstike and IRC... now what is so wrong with that!?!
<FatMan> Warhamster: words cannot describe the problems you have with your existance.

Quote #1267 (+1) [ 2003-11-02, 22:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rik> ROFl, one of my mates fucked a chick with no arms
<WhiteyFord> what really Rik?
<WhiteyFord> thats odd
<WhiteyFord> no hand jobs :(
<Rik> yeh, he's in the Navy, he's done alot of fucked shit
<FreeFrag> :o
<Rik> he was telling me, he did her doggy style on the beach and was going hard, and when he finished, he had almost buried her head since she couldnt keep it above sand
<WhiteyFord> did she have arms before they started fucking?
<WhiteyFord> ROFL
<Falkor> lol she has no arms, and heres mike worrying about not getting a hand job :)
<FreeFrag> ROFL!
<WhiteyFord> ahahahahahahahahhahaa
<Falkor> hahaha
<knowsfords> heh.
<WhiteyFord> thats the most horrible funny thing i have ever heard

Quote #2832 (+2) [ 2005-06-19, 14:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

<the_squid> Eminoir!
<the_squid> i found the rubber cock!
<Eminoir> uh oh.... er..... i was curious?
<the_squid> :|
<the_squid> i also managed to escape the cop shop with a 5 star police rating
<the_squid> which was fun
<Eminoir> oh, gta, right
<the_squid> no this was IRL
<Eminoir> :|

Quote #52 (+1) [ 2002-11-05, 11:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<SileNceR> finally got it in
<SileNceR> my poor fingers :(

Quote #1427 (+1) [ 2003-12-08, 19:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<^_ZAK_^> mmm I'd kill for AC
<FreeFrag> Alternating Current??
<Kazashi> Autocannon?
<Sticks> Atomic Chicken?
<rb> aircon
<FreeFrag> Gee, thanks Cpt. Obvious.
<Sticks> rofl

Quote #87 (+4) [ 2002-11-18, 11:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Strange1> Cut off his penis at birth and have it made into a pacifier for him.....
<z3[n]> Strange1: wtf?!
<Strange1> Damn thats twisted
<Strange1> I feel liek kicking myself

Quote #2753 (+4) [ 2005-05-15, 15:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> www.overclockers.com.au <<-- news posted
<Agg> and ring yer mums
<Ultimata> i already have Agg :)
<csimpson> agg, rang my mum a whole hour ago, get with the times :D
<Agg> I rang mine about 20 mins ago and she wasn't home, hmm
<coroner> id ring my mum but shed just yell at me for being to lazy to walk down stairs

Quote #1106 (+130) [ 2003-10-11, 23:45 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Tommmo> we went for a war drive in the commo, i have a 300W inverter
<Tommmo> anyway so we found this AP.
<Tommmo> then i went to take off again
<Tommmo> and the lights went dim
<Tommmo> and the car stopped :D
<Tommmo> combination of high beam / aircon / 4 laptops + not much car movement made it go flat quick :)
<Tommmo> so we posted a call for help via IRC
<Rik> rofl
<Rage> hahaha nice
<Tommmo> (12:49am) * Aday-LAN (aday@vw18562.dft.com.au) has joined #whirlpool
<Tommmo> (12:49am) <Aday-LAN> Tommmo here.... smarm are you there???
<Tommmo> (12:50am) <Aday-LAN> MrShrub: where are you... ?
<Tommmo> (12:51am) <Aday-LAN> can someone jump start this car :)
<Tommmo> (12:51am) <Aday-LAN> We're.. umm stranded next to an open ap
<Tommmo> (12:51am) <MrShrub> lol...what?
<Tommmo> (12:51am) <MrShrub> HAHAHAHAHA
<Tommmo> >:D
<Tommmo> then the RACV guy turns up and he looks at everyone with laptops in the car outside someone's house at 1AM
<Tommmo> and says 'what the fuck are u blokes doing' :D
<Rage> lol
<Rage> sifnt roll-start
<Rage> or was it auto?
<Tommmo> auto
<FreeFrag> ROFL!!
<Tommmo> i was worried they were gonna discover us iRCiing from their wireless
<Tommmo> and come out the front
<Tommmo> :D
<Rage> hahaa
<Tommmo> whilst stranded :D
<Rage> that'd be so funny
<Rage> "DRIVE MAN DRIVE!!!"
<Rage> "WE CANT"
<Tommmo> hahah..
<Tommmo> "START BITCH"
<Rage> "AAAAHHHHHHHH"
<Rage> heh
<Tommmo> we had an 8 port switch
<Tommmo> and an external omni antenna on the roof :)
<Rage> lol!
<Tommmo> the complete setup :)

Quote #4151 (+10) [ 2007-06-07, 12:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

BFM: Bah, How do I block smilies from my mates MSN. He's assigned normal letters to flashing gifs ffs
echelon_: BFM: the first step is to punch your mate in the face

Quote #4214 (+1) [ 2007-09-26, 23:16 ] [ + | - | X ]

< benz> Is it wrong to sleep with my ex (who cheated on me)'s best mate?
< Nick> its wrong for anyone to sleep with you

Quote #2708 (+8) [ 2005-04-25, 01:02 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Quadbox> schedual you retards

Quote #212 (+5) [ 2002-12-28, 11:18 ] [ + | - | X ]

<aftahours> whats those script things called were it says like everything in a movie. like what they say word for word..
<Forraje> a script
<^catalyst> DURH

Quote #2352 (+2) [ 2004-10-20, 23:15 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> how do I invite oldz again?
<BenZ|iBook> /msg oldz join #overclockers
<Narcolepsy> /msg oldz join #overclockers
<TensopAway> /msg oldz join #overclockers
<voodooo> Agg /msg oldz join #overclockers
<Agg> hmm, maybe it's /msg oldz join #overclockers
<Agg> [23:09] -oldZ- Sorry, You must be logged in to use this command.
<Agg> lies!

Quote #64 (+5) [ 2002-11-08, 06:55 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rudeboi> zit just me or are the new nokia's getting more and more gay? : http://www.howardchui.com/images/reviewpics/expocomm2002/nokia6800-05.jpg
<SileNceR> Rudeboi - you're the only one getting more and more gay.
<Rudeboi> SileNceR: how did u know? ur sexy body just turns me on soo much
* Rudeboi goes and pukes after what he just said

Quote #3319 (+1) [ 2006-04-09, 15:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<rodgrech|W> hey mazzanet where the bloody hell are you
* Grosby bans rodgrech from the UK and the bible-belt of america

Quote #1314 (+3) [ 2003-11-13, 22:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

<rodgrech> SoloFlyer: it doesent matter what day it is, telstra is fucked

Quote #4273 (+5) [ 2008-02-19, 20:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Selekta> anwyay
<Selekta> back to killing that glasnt bitch
* Selekta stabs
* glasnt dies
* glasnt gets reincarnated as a library
<glasnt> Hehe, he can't find me know, cos he doesn't know I exist!
* glasnt cackles

Quote #1547 (+6) [ 2004-01-22, 13:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

(@SpetzNatz): grrr, some friend called me up and asked me to play indoor soccer for his team tonight
(@SpetzNatz): what i'm scared about is when i pwn so much 'cause i'm part wog, then they'll give me a 2 year contract for 25mil then nike and sony will sponsor me and i'll have to play with them like 2 times a week or some shit :(
(@eiko`guybrush): yeah.
(@eiko`guybrush): happens to me when i play chinese checkers

Quote #185 (+5) [ 2002-12-20, 07:02 ] [ + | - | X ]

<VooDoo> Eazy =Eazydzit from the forums???
<Eazy> yup
<Eazy> Is that a bad thing?
<Eazy> :D
<Strange1> yes
* Eazy is now known as anon

Quote #1763 (+11) [ 2004-03-23, 19:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> I may want 10,000 kids, and if I can afford to have them why cant I?
<Falkor> hehe thats a good way to stay single
<Falkor> "I want 10,000 kids..."
<Falkor> *door slam*

Quote #2446 (+3) [ 2004-12-22, 18:16 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Remote_Man> this corsair runs hot
<Remote_Man> what vdimm should i be running it at?
<Narcolepsy> You must do what you feel is right, young luke.
<phextwin> Use the volts Remote_Man.
<Narcolepsy> The DIMM is with you.
<Remote_Man> I can't it's to much
<phextwin> That is where you fail.
<Narcolepsy> You must believe in yourself.
<Narcolepsy> (the forks in strong in this pun)

Quote #2228 (+10) [ 2004-08-08, 23:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Falkor> Redback, fark... on the tip of my tongue..
<Falkor> err. the name of the song that is.
<Redback> you want me to do what on the tip of your tounge?
<Falkor> yeah yeah.. shutup..

Quote #2685 (+1) [ 2005-04-15, 01:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<One``> i have a big head to fit extra dead brain tissue into

Quote #1475 (+1) [ 2004-01-05, 17:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<MonkeyINAbaG> CapnChron, has your sister read that quote?
<CapnChron> No
<CapnChron> NO.. She will NEVER know!
<CapnChron> Hopefully
* CapnChron runs off to do a complete format of the internet
<darktranq> rofl

Quote #310 (+9) [ 2003-02-11, 09:32 ] [ + | - | X ]

<JunkzWork> heh theres a chick on icq called 'buffy'
<JunkzWork> and i just asked her if i could slay her with my tube steak
<JunkzWork> lol and she said yes hahaha

Quote #2246 (+5) [ 2004-08-16, 20:16 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Nozz> I wonder if it's any coincidence that two of the women in the women's shooting atm are named "Suzanne"
<_DDsD> At least it isn't the weightlifting and their name's "John"

Quote #339 (+9) [ 2003-02-16, 14:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

* FreeFrag watches Days of our Lives sometimes. It gives him a warm fuzzy feeling knowing that there are more pathetic people in the world than himself
<Darkness> FreeFrag: They are actors. Therefore, you are the lowest.
<Darkness> :)
<FreeFrag> Darkness, stop destroying my life :'(

Quote #4054 (+7) [ 2007-03-12, 20:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<outy> Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!"
<MonoJoker> fish are stupid, it was probably a weir

Quote #4146 (+1) [ 2007-06-06, 12:59 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> hmm, tempting to buy one of those roomba things.
<Draffa> Hasn't had a wash in probably 4 or 5 months. Since last time it rained, actually.
<MadHatter> what is a roomba?
<Agg> mostly tiles here, and short-pile carpet. i reckon it'd do ok.
<Agg> vacuum robot thing.
<Agg> cruises around vacuuming.
<MadHatter> ahh
<Agg> they used to be shit but apparently they're pretty good now.
<MadHatter> you just need one to mow the lawn too and you are set
<Agg> my wife mows the lawn :)
<MadHatter> hows that for obedience :P
<MadHatter> does she cook?
<Agg> not every night, but pretty regularly
<Teddybear> always good to have room for improvement :p

Quote #4234 (+5) [ 2007-10-24, 00:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jessica> Can I just ask a vague question
<Jessica> How many orgasms have you guys had in one day, like.. maximum?
<devians_> zed is dead baby, zed is dead
<brodsta> ....
<sabretooth> :o
<Jessica> Just out of the blue
<nb-au> lol
<Jessica> Like out of interest
<sabretooth> So yeah *cough* back to sliding cars around
<takai[l]> 200mm f1.8s arnt $7000
<sabretooth> The one I saw one eBay was going for about that after currency conversion (GBP)

Quote #1103 (+3) [ 2003-10-11, 01:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

* neolithic breaks out in an unnecessary rap
<Frag|A> * neolithic breaks out in an unnecessary crap <--Having a normal day again neo?

Quote #2704 (+5) [ 2005-04-23, 13:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yaleman> some guy in a wheelchair got hit by a taxi in the valley the other day
<yaleman> was rolling around yelling " I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs!"
<CapnChron> hahahahahahahaha
<yaleman> well, the first bit is true, the second half I added for funny value

Quote #3201 (+5) [ 2006-01-15, 16:46 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Radar> I *was* going to diss your choice of music, but then realised I was listening to Outkast.

Quote #1626 (+7) [ 2004-02-11, 19:37 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> apple pie is too delicious to be fucked.

Quote #3525 (+4) [ 2006-08-27, 12:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<MadHatter> On playing Othello - "I didn't realise how much I hated that play until I agreed to do it. I don't mind Shakespeare so much, but I really hate Othello. Here was a guy who had been all over the world, kicking ass, looting, plundering and probably raping the baddest babes on the planet. The he falls in love with some teenager and loses his fucking mind. I don't like that idea at all. I mean, how stupid was he?"
* MadHatter falls off his chair
<deepspring> lol
* irvo44 has quit IRC (Quit)
<brod|bmxor> lmao
<Remote> MadHatter, link to this gold?
<deepspring> link us oh masterful master (beta)
* brod|bmxor dons www.overclockers.com.au/ubuntu/powered by sapphire stickered helmet
<MadHatter> find it on imdb under his quotes
<knowsfjord> "I'm sick of these motherfucking shakespear plays on this motherfucking stage"

Quote #469 (+2) [ 2003-04-15, 23:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Quadbox> Nozz: I know a guy that lives in tasmania! What relation is he to you?
<Nozz> Cousin and boyfriend

Quote #267 (+5) [ 2003-01-17, 11:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

<|kermie|> hahahahah SHEP, where every person has a nickname
<Baker> hahahahaha irc, where every person has a nickname

Quote #1208 (+1) [ 2003-10-24, 13:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

* brembo` farts
<brembo`> phwoar that stinks
* echelon hands brembo` a cork
<brembo`> bbiab

Quote #128 (+4) [ 2002-11-27, 05:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Skitzo> umm
<Skitzo> its kinda sick
<Skitzo> some chick shoving her fist up her ass
<Agg> dude, that's not her ass.. you need to get out more
<Agg> er rather, get in more

Quote #2994 (+12) [ 2005-09-21, 01:42 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Warhamster> sigh, one of these days I'm going to go into Bern's TDS and go "Hi Bern, I'm Warhamster", and he's going to pull out a baseball bat and beat the living shit out of me
<Agg> be sure to film it

Quote #2742 (+4) [ 2005-05-10, 06:16 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sancho> "anyone who has even one copy of an unreleased film, software program or music file in a shared folder could be subjected to prison terms and fines of up to three years."
<Sancho> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH SUCKERS
<Sancho> my folder isnt shared :P

Quote #982 (+57) [ 2003-09-01, 01:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Darkness> How is a BIOS updated?
<Agg> ze flash.
<Agg> if flash goes bad, paperweight you have
<Darkness> Eep.
<Agg> but chance is small
<Darkness> I have NFI what i'm doin, but there is only a few options... It has selected my Board for me, ticked internet update and a button with update new bios..
<Agg> make with the clicking then
<Agg> it's a pretty simple process really
<Darkness> eep. here goes.
<Darkness> done, brb
* Darkness has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
<Agg> err
<Agg> SMS from darkness
<Agg> PC not restarting :/

Quote #1300 (+16) [ 2003-11-11, 01:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> about half a block of chocolate makes me feel ill.. i haven't found the quantity of sex that makes me feel ill, but i'm working on it..
<Matex> Agg, 4 times a day makes your penis sore
<Agg> try it with a woman next time, Matex

Quote #157 (+7) [ 2002-12-12, 03:20 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Rudeboi would like to announce, contrary to smokeyou.org implies, that he is NOT GAY
<FreeFrag> Rudeboi, not what you said last night baby

Quote #2668 (+1) [ 2005-04-04, 20:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> okay thats it... someone help me invent a new cheap internet protocol that can be used with existing infrastructure and can be used from 300kms away
<eDust> knowsfords, v92 dialup meets that criteria
<TheWedgie> heheheheh
<knowsfords> eDust: is it fast?
<TheWedgie> owned
<knowsfords> IS IT!
<TheWedgie> faster than v.34
<eDust> my first modem was 2400 baud, so yeah it's fast knowsfords :P