news | imagestore | ircquotes | trade maker | smilies | forums | webmail | login | register    
  Search Quotes

Jump to Quote #

Search for

   Quotes

< Back     Page: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40     Next >

Quote #1477 (0) [ 2004-01-05, 18:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ernest> heh, and all these years i thought I was phallic

Quote #248 (+9) [ 2003-01-14, 10:48 ] [ + | - | X ]

* dspringau remembers to take a "black" light if visits any of these wierdo's houses and scan for cum residue before sitting down
<z3[n]> does cum glow or something?
<dspringau> you need to use polarised sun glasses to see it properly though
<Carrots> it alarms me that so many of us know that semen is UV reactive

Quote #1933 (+1) [ 2004-05-07, 16:23 ] [ + | - | X ]

<idlerpg> XStatic, the FordsSuckWorld, has attained level 5! Next level in 0 days, 00:21:00.
<idlerpg> XStatic [4/19] has challenged knowsfords [15/235] in combat and lost! 0 days, 00:01:28 is added to XStatic's clock.

Quote #1312 (+5) [ 2003-11-13, 17:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Zom> OCAU...
<Zom> is that an australian godzilla or something?

Quote #3825 (+5) [ 2006-12-18, 09:47 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rainwulf_> my amd X2 machine is weird. its getting faster i swear, or im getting slower
<Rainwulf_> probably the caffiene leeching out of my system

Quote #1142 (+4) [ 2003-10-15, 07:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> my plan becomes more viable...
<knowsfords> Rage: no matter how much you dream, an army of automatic ice cream scoops isn't going to give you world wide supremecy
<Rage> bugger
<Rage> guess i'll just have to continue scooping them manually

Quote #642 (+7) [ 2003-06-09, 14:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Narc|Busy> I'm seriously thinking about driving down the road to grab some lollies..
<Banzai> Narc|Busy you fat poo. If it's just down the road ... WALK!
<Narc|Busy> Some sour lollies would go down well...
<Narc|Busy> It's about a 45 minute walk Banzai, I can't afford to waste an hour and a half today...
<Banzai> Well, that isn't down the road is it?
<Narc|Busy> It's only a 5 minute drive...
<Yaleman> Banzai: it IS down the road, just a fair distance
<Rage> narc, just how slow do you walk?
<Narc|Busy> What you should ask is how fast I drive..

Quote #1289 (+27) [ 2003-11-08, 11:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

*** Now talking in #overclockers
<babu> whats overclocking?
<Firemoth> babu, it's when you put your clock forward because of day light savings.
<babu> ok thx firemoth
<Firemoth> You're welcome.

Quote #458 (+6) [ 2003-04-12, 09:48 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Daemon> just don't do what a guy I used to work with did, got done for DD, then crash tackled the police officer who arrested him :)
<Daemon> that doesn't look good in court
<shift> yeah, he should have waited and tackled the judge

Quote #1091 (0) [ 2003-10-09, 00:36 ] [ + | - | X ]

<echelon> <rodgrech> lo yalemon <-- you jamacan now rodgrech?

Quote #1135 (+60) [ 2003-10-15, 07:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

<CapnChron> MY GOD!!!
<CapnChron> I'm soo gonna fucking kick my sister out of the house
<CapnChron> She's a paradise
<CapnChron> erm
<CapnChron> Parasite!
<@Frag[W]> LOL
* @Frag[W] falls over.
<CapnChron> I feel voliated now!
<CapnChron> Yesterday my sister says she's having a friend over because our parents ain't here for few days.
<CapnChron> Right..
<CapnChron> This morning... I came home from work
<CapnChron> about 6:45am
<CapnChron> I go upstairs.. There's 2 kitchens
<CapnChron> One downstairs, one upstairs
<CapnChron> I'm like..
<CapnChron> Fuck man
<CapnChron> this is gross
<CapnChron> happened to me TWICE@!
<CapnChron> Right.. This girl!
<CapnChron> She's sitting on the stool eating breakfast looking at the view
<CapnChron> I'm like "Damn... She's wearing panties and a pink shirt
<CapnChron> I'm thinking sexy thoughts what I want to do with her
<CapnChron> "hot ass. I'd tap that!"
<CapnChron> All that shit you guys would think when you see some hot ass
<CapnChron> I go to the fridge to get a milkshake to join the girl
<CapnChron> Guess who I see walks into the kitchen
<CapnChron> Her fucking friend
<CapnChron> I'm like "wtf"
<CapnChron> She says hello
<CapnChron> I go "Hi..." Looked over to this girl...
<CapnChron> Eww
<CapnChron> i'M SICK
<CapnChron> I thought sexy thoughts of my fucking sister again!
* CapnChron jumps off from his bedroom window
<CapnChron> TWICE!!!
* CapnChron feeds his sister shitloads of food
<CapnChron> Get fat bitch!
<@Lone[Zz]> dude ... that's going straight to ugbox

Quote #406 (+3) [ 2003-03-18, 23:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<influx|cs> can someone please teach me how to not suck at the internet

Quote #3453 (+9) [ 2006-07-18, 12:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<benz> I just realised im at a church, and my wallpaper is "Jesus did it for the chicks"

Quote #1788 (+10) [ 2004-03-29, 23:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Ultimata> god my bird is nuts: he just put his head into his bell like a helmet and goes crazy whistling
<b0x> remembering bird nam :p
<Draffa> "Kitty! In the trees!"

Quote #3463 (-2) [ 2006-07-22, 01:47 ] [ + | - | X ]

< Rage> hmm
< Rage> anyone know how to teach me to get a funky porn groove happening on the guitar?
< lagmaster> play with your willy?

Quote #4264 (+2) [ 2008-01-23, 14:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

Rainwulf: apparently at some interview he was visibly shaking
Rainwulf: i dont know the full story
Rainwulf: so im going to string together bits of hearsay
Rainwulf: and make something out of it
Rainwulf: yay, im a FOX news reporter!

Quote #445 (-1) [ 2003-04-03, 22:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<^catalyst> man, I burnt my tongue on a fuckin cappicino
<^catalyst> its reallllly pissin me of.
<^catalyst> of
<^catalyst> ff
<^catalyst> OFF
<^catalyst> IM NOT A RETARD

Quote #1767 (+2) [ 2004-03-24, 19:58 ] [ + | - | X ]

<eDust> did u guys know phone companies keep a log of all SMS's sent
<TheWedgie> eDust: yes, yes i did.
<eDust> :|
<TheWedgie> but you'd be surprised at how hard it is to get access to them, and how heavily the system is logged
<TheWedgie> with telstra anyhoo. ;)
<Fod> can't get at them with telstra because the server is down?

Quote #1183 (0) [ 2003-10-21, 07:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

(james-2): I don't use a virus scanner either
(tensop): james-: mind if i email you a little program i mate
(tensop): its called notavirus.vbs

Quote #1546 (+6) [ 2004-01-21, 21:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<D_Web> what do you call a mexian guy who's had his car stolen?
<D_Web> Carlos

Quote #2572 (+5) [ 2005-02-07, 00:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<n0f34r> its 12:10.. I'm 18!
<llamaboy> n0f34r: happy 18th man
<n0f34r> thats :)
<n0f34r> thanks* :)
<llamaboy> hows it feel to be legal :P
<n0f34r> no different then wat i was doing b4 :P
<n0f34r> brb
<n0f34r> gotta go buy smokes
<llamaboy> lolk
<n0f34r> back
<n0f34r> bitch didnt ask for id :@
<llamaboy> HAHAHA!
<llamaboy> pwned

Quote #1178 (-4) [ 2003-10-20, 17:59 ] [ + | - | X ]

(@Preshus): nooooooo I am not allowed to lift anything over 6kgs
(@Preshus): made holding Phobos' cawk very hard
(@Preshus): :P
(@Blade): isnt it the other way round?
(@Blade): holding Phobos made it hard?
(@Preshus): hahaha
(Phobos): lets stop talkin about my pee pee thanks

Quote #2576 (-2) [ 2005-02-10, 18:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Tatey> we need everyone to contribute evenly
<David> its all good
<Tatey> I'll buy $10 drinks
<Tatey> you can buy $10 sausages
<David> cool
<Tatey> flora can perform $10 favours
<Tatey> it's all good
<David> LOL
<Soulfire> i get them free?
<Soulfire> you guys got jibbed

Quote #93 (+7) [ 2002-11-19, 04:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

<the_essent> yeah well my 19" flat shit on all ur montors
<milenko> the_essent: my moniter shits on yours
<Agg> my dad could beat up your dad

Quote #2578 (+12) [ 2005-02-11, 11:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fod|Work> Fod's illustrated guide to social awkwardness:
<Fod|Work> so we went to see a mate's band play last night
<Fod|Work> after the set, we were standing around having a few beers when i saw this little kid out of the corner of my eye
<Fod|Work> so i turned round and yelled "HEY! YOU AREN'T EIGHTEEN!!"
<Fod|Work> (as you do)
<Fod|Work> it was a midget.

Quote #95 (+8) [ 2002-11-19, 06:36 ] [ + | - | X ]

<trent> sabretooth: you should know i only turn up in here when something is broken

Quote #1276 (+3) [ 2003-11-04, 15:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ElCrunch> Ohh, the version of Johnny English I'm downloading appears to actually be Johnny English
<ElCrunch> Makes a nice bloody change
<DDsD> Its better when its lesbian pron
<Falkor> lol

Quote #4289 (+1) [ 2008-03-28, 22:10 ] [ + | - | X ]

<falkor> why do you want to go to manilla? :/
<knowsfjord> he wants to visit the factory where they make all the folders

Quote #1464 (+1) [ 2003-12-29, 17:55 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sim0n> oh dear god, if i ever lost my cable connection, i think id rather hang upself with the 56k modem cable than hook it up to the socket

Quote #2484 (+41) [ 2005-01-10, 01:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<MadHatter> my first pc was an apple
<Agg> that's like saying your first car was a bicycle

Quote #2088 (0) [ 2004-06-28, 23:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<kizzzap> I recon all that UGBox needs is a porn section
<kizzzap> UGPorn

Quote #2663 (+2) [ 2005-04-02, 22:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yale> thetron: when you learn to spell, you can pick on people :)
<thetron> I can sell
<ace[work]> bwuhaha
<Lurks> omgooglies
<ace[work]> now thetron shutup before you make an even bigger arse of yourself :)
<yale> well, that proves my point entirely.
<yale> if you want, I can help you jam the other foot in your mouth :)

Quote #2527 (+5) [ 2005-01-23, 14:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<outonanisl> Frag|A, sometimes i feel as if im trapped, and i dont know where to walk away to
<eDust> bottle it up
<eDust> let the anger build up over years
<FreeFrag> Then track down edust and kill him.
<eDust> i'm in sydney, just ask for eDust

Quote #1416 (+5) [ 2003-12-05, 00:18 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> i once sent a package to sciby at his work, addressed to Scott "God among Men" Eiby

Quote #2822 (+3) [ 2005-06-14, 23:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@CapnChron> wtf
<@CapnChron> chicks play Everquest 2 now??
<@CapnChron> I smsed a chick for a root
<@CapnChron> her reply "can't, playing everquest 2"

Quote #3470 (+1) [ 2006-07-27, 03:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<aftahours> i found out tonight that hippo's sweat is red.
<aftahours> facinating stuff.
<Dopefish> really
<Dopefish> why is it red
<aftahours> dunno
<aftahours> apparently acts like sunscreen
<Moodles> god only had a red crayon left
<Agg> ROFL

Quote #3055 (+3) [ 2005-10-29, 19:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Bostik> when i realised the other week she reminded me of my mother i was truly disgusted
<Bostik> i wanted to end it right there. but then i realised she does things to me my mother never would..

Quote #1787 (+12) [ 2004-03-29, 22:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> cmon, you slow pos.
* knowsfords punches his modem
* knowsfords - Quit (Quit: connection reset by peer)

Quote #128 (+4) [ 2002-11-27, 05:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Skitzo> umm
<Skitzo> its kinda sick
<Skitzo> some chick shoving her fist up her ass
<Agg> dude, that's not her ass.. you need to get out more
<Agg> er rather, get in more

Quote #171 (+5) [ 2002-12-16, 08:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Decker> Cav worships the ass demon
* Cav is just like that :)
<Womb0> Cav: ur strange
<Cav> yeah
<Cav> im a complete fucking wierdo :)

Quote #2461 (+3) [ 2005-01-02, 00:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Reaver> meh, nite
<Reaver> feist beckons
<Reaver> not that he's in my bed or anything

Quote #1692 (+8) [ 2004-02-25, 21:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Owen> I FART IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION
<Carl> GJ, you get a gold star! :D
<Owen> w00t I win!
<Carl> Nah, it's pretty easy to get one
<Carl> Rachael did for pusing random keys before

Quote #614 (-1) [ 2003-06-01, 21:14 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Tate has quit IRC (Your father had your mother, your mother had your brother, it's just too bad your fathers mad, your mothers now your lover)
<FLoRa> That is one of the most fucked up quit messages ever.
<Hydra> and this one is too: [20:26] *** DoWnUnDeR Quit (I was raised by the tv and Jerry Springer was my brother, and my mothers cousin was the uncle of my sister's niece...)
<Greg> OMG YUCK
<FLoRa> ...
<FLoRa> That's some seriously whacked shit.
<Greg> lol
<Greg> i just fully grasped the grossness of that
<Greg> actually
<Greg> i still dont get the grossness of that saying
<Greg> im even drawing a diagram for it

Quote #388 (-1) [ 2003-03-09, 21:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> http://www.msi.com.tw/program/products/mainboard/mbd/pro_mbd_detail.php?UID=22&MODEL=MS-6378 <--would this run a TBred?
<thetron> ain't that a cele board?
<thetron> looked like my sisters
<sabretooth> your sisters look like a Celeron motherboard?

Quote #2472 (+4) [ 2005-01-07, 12:18 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Cathar> what is a bride?
<Cathar> 'tis a woman who has just been married
<Cathar> this is why women smile when they're walking down the aisle
<Cathar> they know that they've given their last blowjob

Quote #1589 (-1) [ 2004-02-03, 22:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<aftahours> hmm i wonder why there is so many skin firming lotions going around
<aftahours> especially ads on tv
<Hunter> because people buy anything?
<aftahours> yeah, but I dont need lotion to get firm
<aftahours> skin
<kitt3n> ..
<aftahours> :
<fen> you might need lotion atfer you get firm tho ;)
<aftahours> haha

Quote #2667 (+10) [ 2005-04-04, 17:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<doughnut> someone should whisper to the pope that it's now past april 1st and this is getting silly

Quote #563 (+2) [ 2003-05-16, 19:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Carrots> if I was on big brother and I got eviected, I'd be like.. hug them all and like, "I blew my load in your shampoo...etc"
<RoSWeLL> rofl u sicko...
<RoSWeLL> worst thing is they play re-runs of the housemates washing themselves in Carrots seaman

Quote #284 (+3) [ 2003-01-26, 12:26 ] [ + | - | X ]

<\Roscoe> 30 seconds? I last longer when having sex.
<Lurks> \Roscoe: what you only last 31 seconds?
<\Roscoe> 34 thank you very much.

Quote #475 (+56) [ 2003-04-17, 00:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> i think the biggest purchasers of cheerleader costumes would be pr0n sites... :P
<bundy> that and kinky old me
<bundy> men
<bundy> men
<bundy> shit
<bundy> typo