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Quote #2146 (+2) [ 2004-07-14, 16:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<waz|away> and yeah, those replays of Hopoate crack me up everytime
<waz|away> what the fuck was he thinking?
<waz|away> besides "theres a hole, Im gonna put my finger in it"

Quote #2171 (+2) [ 2004-07-21, 13:15 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Owen> Cool. Giant mandarine in the fridge.
<Paladin> i wish I had some giant fruits at tafe with me
<Paladin> oh wait, I do
<Paladin> stupid people.... hate them all

Quote #2272 (+2) [ 2004-09-03, 02:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Darkash> but i ran out of light
<Darkash> so i had to leave it to tommorrow
<@Lartnec> heeey thats an idea, we could make some sort of lighting device that we could use when it gets dark
<@Lartnec> maybe some fire on the end of a bit of string
<@Lartnec> with soemthing.... lets say wax around it
<@Carl> Lartnec, will it have a TV?
<@Lartnec> I was thinking a mobile phone

Quote #2333 (+2) [ 2004-10-15, 01:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

<GFORCE> sup Agg
<Agg> GFORCE - take the hint, i don't respond to "sup agg"
<predder> Agg - do you respond to iceland women --> http://this.is/criple/Myndir%20022.jpg :D
<Agg> predder - she's orrite :)
<Agg> if this slowly-loading picture turns out to have a penis attached to the bottom third of it, i'm going to be very upset.
<predder> damn, didnt realise how big that image was
<eDust> it's safe Agg
<predder> heh, you'll be pleasantly suprised
<Agg> mmm, she's just how i like my women. out of focus and with lots of CCD noise.

Quote #2408 (+2) [ 2004-12-04, 08:47 ] [ + | - | X ]

<sabretooth> Yeah who's the nerd now!
<biatch> This is like pot calling the kettle black, huh?
<sabretooth> Miss MMORPG!
<biatch> Shut up, bitch.

Quote #2467 (+2) [ 2005-01-04, 20:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Agg changes topic to '<neolithic> some bitch was right up me <biatch> Better than re-stuffing when he gets fatter :P'

Quote #2563 (+2) [ 2005-02-04, 09:10 ] [ + | - | X ]

<i386> nko
<i386> I got my mac working yesterday
<nko> uber
<nko> is it pure sex in a box?
<nko> or is it average sex in a box
<nko> or not even sex, maybe something plain, like a handjob in a box
<nko> which, while still enjoyable, is not nearly as pleasurable as even average sex in a box

Quote #2567 (+2) [ 2005-02-05, 09:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<mazzanet> i want a tribe of 30 south american monkeys.
<Mred32> Didn't you say you already had a large family?

Quote #2581 (+2) [ 2005-02-13, 00:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<marv> Hey
<marv> I just got a new bed
<marv> and its stiff as, i hate it
<marv> do they get less firm over time?
<Iroquois> yes
<marv> good
<Iroquois> try jumping on it
<marv> Dont wanna break it
<Warhamster> hmmm i read that from the bottom up and that sounded... odd
<Iroquois> heh

Quote #2587 (+2) [ 2005-02-16, 21:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

* PoissonBot|akaHardy has joined #valhalla
<PoissonBot|akaHardy> can someone give me an xp VL key...
<TheWedgie> GOTOA-PCSTO-REAND-PAYFO-RIT!!
<TheWedgie> heh, that was much funnier while I was typing it.
<PoissonBot|akaHardy> whats the last two letters?
<TheWedgie> 11
<TheWedgie> my shift key was stuck.
<PoissonBot|akaHardy> doesn't work...
<PoissonBot|akaHardy> is it a VLK?
* The_Wookie slaps TheWedgie around with several types of marine creature
<TheWedgie> hang on PoissonBot|akaHardy
<PoissonBot|akaHardy> thanks
* PoissonBot|akaHardy is now known as Hardy
<TheWedgie> AREY0-USER1-0USLY-THI55-TUP1D
<TheWedgie> *sigh*
<Hardy> haha
<TheWedgie> finally clicked? :P
* Hardy forces a broom up TheWedgie's rectum

Quote #2591 (+2) [ 2005-02-17, 19:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

[ One`` ] my cars beginning to rust, even though i spray it with WD40

Quote #2592 (+2) [ 2005-02-17, 21:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

(LaNcE): what is it with this influx of cheap bar&plate intercoolers!
(Tensopaway): truck carrying intercoolers was hijacked by 4 people driving black honda civics with green underbody neons and kettle blow off valves
(FreeFrag): ROFL
(LaNcE): hahaha
(yale|nfsu2): lol

Quote #2606 (+2) [ 2005-02-24, 14:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

* sabretooth changes topic to '* FreeFrag uses the abovementioned wooden spoon on Firemoth's ass <Firemoth> Harder! * FreeFrag spanks harder <Freefrag> Oooh!'

Quote #2630 (+2) [ 2005-03-18, 11:47 ] [ + | - | X ]

[ bkuebler]: wait.
[ bkuebler]: allow me to check my facts.
[ bkuebler]: I am an idiot...
[ rjbs]: You needed to *check* that?

Quote #2647 (+2) [ 2005-03-25, 19:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<n00dle> that was really wierd
<n00dle> i was having a ciggy in my usual spot
<n00dle> at the top of the street
<n00dle> and got to the house and dad is standing in front of the door
<n00dle> and im like 'oh fuck.'
<n00dle> he walks up to me and im like 'hi..'
<n00dle> and he motions for me to give him my hand
<n00dle> so i do
<n00dle> and he dumps something in my hand
<n00dle> and im like er... and he goes 'pretzels!'
<n00dle> and walks off
<n00dle> ...

Quote #2652 (+2) [ 2005-03-26, 18:23 ] [ + | - | X ]

·CapnChron· I met one of Yale's sister.
·Narcolepsy· Which one?
·CapnChron· Narcolepsy: I don't know which one.
·CapnChron· Tall one that is
·Narcolepsy· The whole fucking family is tall.
·Narcolepsy· The young one or the horse-lookin' one?
·CapnChron· The young one that looks like him
·Narcolepsy· And her legs are longer than her torso?
·CapnChron· I don't know, I didn't activate my perve mode

Quote #2688 (+2) [ 2005-04-16, 14:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ColdFusion> would any of you believe me if i said i did 160 past a cop in an unmarked, they pulled me over and i got nothing?
<Lurks> ColdFusion: did you have to swallow?
<ColdFusion> i know it sounds REALLY bs
<ColdFusion> no
<Lurks> so you spat?
<ColdFusion> no
<yaleman> gargled :P
<Lurks> lol
<ColdFusion> ..

Quote #2718 (+2) [ 2005-04-28, 10:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

[ canadiant]: Im in love lol. I found a girl that can subnet! :D

Quote #2739 (+2) [ 2005-05-09, 19:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<angelessme> the volume of asian schoolgirls there between 3-5 makes it look like japan
<tensopaway> yeah but none of them are hot
<psy^> i'm glad you said that tensopaway
<psy^> schoolgirls between 3-5 rarely are

Quote #2740 (+2) [ 2005-05-09, 21:58 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@D_Web> it looks like telstra is being stupid again
<@D_Web> irc is working but that's about it
<@D_Web> I'll be disconnected in a sec
* D_Web has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
* D_Web has joined #ugbox
<@D_Web> power cycled the modem
<@D_Web> should be ok for about 30 seconds
<@Falkor> WOOO
<@Falkor> TALK QUICKLY
<@Falkor> OMG D_Web how was your day?
<@Falkor> good? yes. cool. hows your mum?
<@Falkor> good? cool how was the weather?
<@Falkor> awesome! when are you buying a new car?!?
<@Falkor> tomorrow! WOOOOO!! YEAH!!
<@gords> heh
* D_Web` has joined #ugbox
* Z sets mode: +o D_Web`
<@Falkor> ahh shit.

Quote #2747 (+2) [ 2005-05-12, 01:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<sagit> it is currently precipitating heavily here
<hazza-> ?
<timace> its raining, fag

Quote #2839 (+2) [ 2005-06-22, 04:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> so, someone tell me something new.
<predder> ''Something New'' was the Beatles' third Capitol release, but fifth American album following the UA release of ''A Hard Day's Night''. This album includes songs left off that release except "I'll Be Back", as well as the remaining tracks "Slow Down" and "Matchbox" from the ''Long Tall Sally'' EP and the German release of "I Want To Hold Your Hand".

In 2004 this album was released for the first time on CD as part of ''The Capitol Albums, Volume 1'' box set.

Quote #2899 (+2) [ 2005-07-25, 09:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Narcolepsy> I could, I suppose, go and drop off my crank.
<Lexi> er... crank?
<Narcolepsy> Crankshaft.
<Lexi> Sounds kinky? :)
<Narcolepsy> Getting it reground and balanced, and possibly other work done to it.
<Narcolepsy> And if they can press the gudgeon pins out of my pistons, they can balance and shot peen my conrods while they're at it.
<Lexi> Either you're talking about a car, or you're talking about some very interesting sexual fantasy. Which is it?
<Narcolepsy> Car. Engine rebuild. Go fast bits. No sex.
<shift> i thought it was both
<shift> the car was part of his sexual fantasy
<Narcolepsy> I DENY!
<Lexi> Is its semen black?
<Narcolepsy> Yes.
<Lexi> Ah, so it WAS a sexual fantasy :)
<Narcolepsy> And it leaks lots of it every day.

Quote #2953 (+2) [ 2005-08-26, 20:37 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Umber> I always found school totally contradictory
<Umber> In normal schools, trying to pat your head while rubbing your stomach is considered somewhat of a scientific experiment to find how much self control you have
<Umber> Whilst in "special" schools, it's a sign of no self control whatsoever

Quote #2962 (+2) [ 2005-09-01, 17:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

--- VoX is now known as VeganZombie
<VeganZombie> GRAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSS........
--- VeganZombie is now known as VoX

Quote #3036 (+2) [ 2005-10-19, 22:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jazarus> I want to stop looking at porn and go back to going to church
<Fred_Nurk> sure you do
<IKT> get a psp, do both at the same time

Quote #3051 (+2) [ 2005-10-28, 09:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

oli: any car knowledgable people here?
Grosby: what do you need to know about a car?
oli: ive got a car sitting in the driveway with a jack under one side, and two piles of bricks on the other
oli: a monaro
oli: :(
Grosby: You live in Ipswich?

Quote #3059 (+2) [ 2005-10-31, 20:46 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Junkz> a female call centre chick in india rang me tonight
<Junkz> and i ruined her lifge
<Junkz> i dont know where from
<Junkz> but she only wanted to take 40 seconds of my time
<Junkz> so before she started i said “can i ask a question first?”
<Junkz> she said yes
<Junkz> BIG MISTAKE
<Junkz> i ask “what colour panties are you wearing?”
<Junkz> silence for 10 seconds
<Crudmuffin> ROFL Junkz
<Junkz> “im sorry i cant answe that quiestion
<Junkz> so i say “oh ok... does that mean you arent wearing any panties today?”
<Crudmuffin> haha
<kermie> klif-e asked the exact same questions to the woman at the real estate agent today
<Junkz> 20 seconds of silence
<Junkz> then she gave me the end of call speel
<Junkz> so i hung up
<Junkz> poor girl
<Junkz> she shoulda told me what colour
<Junkz> then i would have entertained her

Quote #3111 (+2) [ 2005-11-27, 20:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fod> uwe boll
<Fod> the man is a genius
<Fod> no doubt about it
<Fod> no one could possibly be that hopeless, so the only alternative is that he's simply misunderstood

Quote #3127 (+2) [ 2005-12-10, 00:07 ] [ + | - | X ]

<eNeb`Destero> what is his real name?
<Daemo> whats it matter? just use his online name
<Daemo> 90% of people call me Daemo in real life too
<eNeb`Destero> ok i got his ip dont worry
<Daemo> you gonna call him by his IP address?
<Daemo> hey, 61.9.128.13, get your ass over here now!

Quote #3171 (+2) [ 2006-01-05, 10:14 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Hunter> i prefer to think of them as attainable women, rather than ugly
<Hunter> shard, i only have a few selection criteria
<One``> I require there to be a hole for birthing, and hands for cooking.

Quote #3237 (+2) [ 2006-02-03, 01:23 ] [ + | - | X ]

<dec> is it sad if I go out and just 'admire' my car?
<dec> or peek at it through the window?
<dec> maybe i could just go and sleep in it tonight
<aftahours> lol
<dec> i was serious :(

Quote #3273 (+2) [ 2006-02-28, 12:55 ] [ + | - | X ]

-!- phrenzy has joined #hungover
<phrenzy> who knew one day i could irc from the toilet at work
<phrenzy> what an age
<@myne> tis indeed grand when thou canst irc whilst thou doest pee

Quote #3270 (+2) [ 2006-02-25, 20:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<thetron> FreeFrag: Most of the news is copy and paste
<FreeFrag> thetron, no, it clearly isn't.
<FreeFrag> You have to write up a bit about what each news article is about, and you're nto cabapel of doineg taht.
<thetron> I can't understand what you said. Atleast i could spell it right

Quote #3276 (+2) [ 2006-03-04, 11:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

<WedgieAFK> sure you can do without it, it's still a 'want' rather than a 'need'
<@Laninoir> like anal
* eraserwk its a need

Quote #3315 (+2) [ 2006-04-06, 19:09 ] [ + | - | X ]

DJStudd: ffs
DJStudd: Just got gastro from my wife 45 minutes ago
DJStudd: puked the second I got out of the car :(
Stygian: DJ-Studd: sux2bu :P
DJStudd: that it does :'(
Stygian: got a laptop?
Stygian: cos you'll be IRCing from the toilet sooner or later :P
Bern: Try cooking her for a bit longer next time DJStudd
Stygian: unless you go for some REALLY out there stuff
MonoAWAY: I read news.com.au on the toilet this morning
DJStudd: ha ha Stygian :(
MonoAWAY: who said men can't multitask? :)

Quote #3319 (+2) [ 2006-04-09, 15:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<rodgrech|W> hey mazzanet where the bloody hell are you
* Grosby bans rodgrech from the UK and the bible-belt of america

Quote #3335 (+2) [ 2006-04-25, 15:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

Baker: Heh, I just zoomed in and found my car at work on Google Earth

Quote #3363 (+2) [ 2006-05-12, 01:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FatMan> i'm not bitter about movies inaccurately portraying tech stuff.
<FatMan> i don't hate myself for doing engineering.
* FatMan taps gun to head
<aftahours> lol
<FatMan> i'm off to play russian roulette with myself. goodnight.
<FatMan> i swear, fuck razors. real self-destructive people do engineeirng.
<Rage> :S
* bullet has joined #overclockers
<Rage> oh, thats really poor timing bullet.
<aftahours> LOL
* aftahours falls off chair
<FatMan> hahahahaha

Quote #3474 (+2) [ 2006-07-29, 14:46 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Andypoo> Actually -- she rebooted the box. That's why :)
<Andypoo> Maybe other people are taking advantage of her box also :P
<insomniac> exactly how many people take advantage of your sister's box?
<Andypoo> Indeed.

Quote #3495 (+2) [ 2006-08-06, 16:22 ] [ + | - | X ]

< beta> I dont know alot about linux
< devians__> you dont seem to know much about anything beta

Quote #3501 (+2) [ 2006-08-08, 22:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<klif-e> Number of babies
<klif-e> Based on your response to question 3 (sex), you are not required to answer this question
<klif-e> ;)
<Norgs-> what?
<Norgs-> you had sex with babies?
<Norgs-> thats bad klif-e.
<xphile> lol
<Simboo> lol
<Simboo> fkn poms

Quote #4353 (+2) [ 2008-07-27, 21:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<sg> HAI
<Tank> HAI
<@Wayne> HAI
<Tank> HAI
<glasnt> BAI
<@Wayne> NAI
<@Sniper9300> WAI
<Tank> YAI
<SirPNut> anyway, night guys
<@Wayne> GAI
<brodsta> NOWAI
<@Agg> FISH
<@Agg> wait, what

Quote #3558 (+2) [ 2006-09-20, 00:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<thetron> Will[A]y: Well i have no mobile. Only a Skype line :)
<Will[A]y> thats totally useless but ok :)
<@Agg> how forward-thinking of you :)
<@Agg> unless you want to leave your house at any point.

Quote #3676 (+2) [ 2006-12-05, 17:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Lits> today i saw what looked like a chick giving her boyfriend a blowjob on a train station platform
<tensop> damnit.. need a job
<tensop> so fkn bored

Quote #3891 (+2) [ 2006-12-22, 09:40 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Frost|work> Draffa|a: I tried dating a girl 3 years younger than me a little while ago, NEVER AGAIN
<noel-fjord> Frost|work: she stole your crayons?
<Frost|work> noel-fjord: worse, my blankey :(

Quote #4153 (+2) [ 2007-06-07, 19:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sunset> ffs i was at work tonight till 6:30pm for a hung jury :(
<Torched> how do you know they were hung?

Quote #4122 (+2) [ 2007-05-19, 11:31 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Narcolepsy> Porn isn't illegal, indeed. You're allowed to have a couple of porn mags at RAAF recruits (rules apply, but anyway), yet they won't let the navy keep anything remotely pornographic at Cerberus.
<Narcolepsy> No wonder the navy's a little...funny.
<brodsta> lol
<Torched> a little strange
<enigma> lits-hp: starcraft3 rts ftw!
<deepspring> rofl
<Torched> a little...queer
<Draffa> In the Navy...

Quote #4124 (+2) [ 2007-05-21, 16:55 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Wuz) i flashed my mp3 player the other day
(@RPM) did it laugh at how small your willy was?
(Megasaxon) lol
(Wuz) it took me a moment to get that

Quote #4047 (+2) [ 2007-03-03, 15:46 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> ocau's forums are basically just one big guestbook for my blog.