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Quote #1540 (+2) [ 2004-01-20, 19:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FatMan> the only reason the indians can speak good english
<FatMan> is that they're all trained by telstra
<PooJou> LOL
<FatMan> as customer support
<zen> lmao!
* PooJou dies

Quote #1104 (+1) [ 2003-10-11, 19:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> woot, japanese chef challange on SBS
<Rage> bbl
<Rage> :D

Quote #785 (+7) [ 2003-07-15, 21:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@DNT-PSH-ME> im boreddddddd
<@_NeMeSiS_> Whack It.
<@DNT-PSH-ME> already did
<@_NeMeSiS_> Only once?

Quote #872 (+5) [ 2003-08-10, 23:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sponge> we found this mag at t42 with nude pics in it right
<Sponge> so we tore the pages out
<head_rush> Did you beat off
<Sponge> and when wee were at iso
<Sponge> we stood at the top of the lift and kept sending a page at a time down stairs
<Sponge> the lift would come back up empty

Quote #153 (+9) [ 2002-12-11, 12:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Spartacus> my ex g/f was good at lappies :D
<Firemoth> Spartacus, the local stripper isn't a girlfriend dude.. :P

Quote #3246 (+6) [ 2006-02-10, 16:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

-!- Bostik has joined...
<Bostik> well, that was the stupidest thing i have done in a while
<Bostik> i applied for a job while high
<Rara_Avis> lol
<Rara_Avis> how'd it go?
<Bostik> i knew it was going to go badly. the first thing i did once i got to Burnside was walk into a glass door.

Quote #1024 (+2) [ 2003-09-10, 17:09 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowfords> We're whalers on the moon... we carry our harpoon... but there aint no whales so we tell tall tales and sing our whalin' tune
<echelon> But there comes a time, when all whalers must pine for an ocean oh-so-blue. So until that time, we'll drink our wine and just harpoon our poo.

Quote #623 (+3) [ 2003-06-04, 19:10 ] [ + | - | X ]

<NertMonkey> * NertMonkey jumps up and down *
<kiddo> maenz
<NertMonkey> SOMEBODY ENTERTAIN NERTMONKEY!!!!!
* kiddo gets on his knees
<kiddo> oops
<kiddo> "wrong chan"

Quote #373 (+4) [ 2003-03-03, 21:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Vindictive whacks Darkness
<Darkness> Get the fuck off me you little Imp.

Quote #1720 (+11) [ 2004-03-04, 23:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

<magey> This is never more evident than in wedding pictures. There's always the glimmering, breathtakingly beautiful bride, arms linked to some tuxedoed chimp who looks more like he should be on a corner somewhere banging symbols together for change. This is actually why the wedding veil was first invented. We needed a way to hide how much more attractive the bride was and paper bags were too blatant.
<nwatts> rofl
<nwatts> hahaha
<nwatts> that is fucking gold
<FatMan> ROFL!
<magey> The closest thing guys have to wonderbras are those novelty t-shirts with the muscles drawn on them.

Quote #1525 (+9) [ 2004-01-15, 20:20 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Grosby) I can't eat KFC, looks too much like a wrinkled up testicle

Quote #3111 (+2) [ 2005-11-27, 20:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fod> uwe boll
<Fod> the man is a genius
<Fod> no doubt about it
<Fod> no one could possibly be that hopeless, so the only alternative is that he's simply misunderstood

Quote #205 (+12) [ 2002-12-24, 04:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

* XiTatiON returns...
<sabz> Woohoo! He returned!
* XiTatiON returns...
<VooDooo> both personalities too it seems

Quote #2068 (+11) [ 2004-06-22, 07:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Gobbie> Invite to MS XP SP2 Thingo $0, Sitting thru the propeganda $0, 3 beers 2 wines and a champers $0, Having your phone ring to "Bannana Phone" in a close to silent room and having lots of ppl look at you, Priceless

Quote #554 (+8) [ 2003-05-15, 01:48 ] [ + | - | X ]

(MadHatter): how about we have a sing song?
(MadHatter): ill start
(MadHatter): mama shes has taught me well
(MadHatter): told me when i was young
(Darkness): to STFU or i'll beat the shit outa you?
(Cav): lol

Quote #2540 (+5) [ 2005-01-27, 16:02 ] [ + | - | X ]

[ vanguard- ] *you must be this tall to ride the netsplit*

Quote #1103 (+2) [ 2003-10-11, 01:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

* neolithic breaks out in an unnecessary rap
<Frag|A> * neolithic breaks out in an unnecessary crap <--Having a normal day again neo?

Quote #2109 (+2) [ 2004-07-06, 09:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<blah1234> Thhhza, i run X-Chat on WIndoze instead of mirc. Pretty good and free
<Tensop> blah1234: anti-conformist bastard :)
<Quilb> Tensop: need i remind you that you are running linux in vmware?

Quote #4221 (+6) [ 2007-10-08, 10:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

[10:38] <@Wayne> FFS, I was attacked by a bird.
[10:38] <Chamelion> Lucky SOB.
[10:39] <@Wayne> When I was riding my bike from the service station after I had put some air in my tires, a magpie kept swooping me
[10:39] <@Wayne> It even had some goes at me with its claws.
[10:41] <Chamelion> Ohh, a bird bird.

Quote #2697 (+6) [ 2005-04-20, 03:36 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Tensop`): ill just say im an indian immigrant with year 10
(Tensop`): then i can work for telstra :P
(Frag[LTOP]): lol
(KngtRider): they are outsourcing....
(Tensop`): hello thankyou please sir welcome to telstra how may i help you please KngtRider

Quote #3056 (+5) [ 2005-10-30, 20:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<VooDoo> Agg: i had a race with a guy on a bike the other day
<VooDoo> Aprilla 2 stroke thing. I destroyed him :D
<Agg> you destroyed his mighty 125 or 250cc engine.. go you :)

Quote #2270 (+5) [ 2004-09-01, 19:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Falkor): nice. vaginal thrush ads
(brembo`): put them around dinner time too, Brilliant!
(Rage): brilliant!

Quote #1351 (+6) [ 2003-11-17, 22:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Darkness> I was speaking to a bloke the other day, (who is a few 6ers short of a case).. who was telling me him and his mates were away in a cabin, drank all their beer and were all still not drunk, and only had 1/2 a bot of vodka left... (cont)
<quaife> yep yep :)
<Darkness> So, they would turn a shotglass upsite down, pour vodka onto it, and snort it
<FenrisOlf> ...alrighty then...
<Darkness> Then, after the feeling came back into their nose, they would fill a shotglass with vodka, then hold it up to one of their eyes
<Darkness> their theory was, it would go past the eye, and into the brain, for instant drunk
<NickoPen> lol
<FenrisOlf> hahahaha =)
<quaife> omfg
<quaife> is that possible?

Quote #79 (+7) [ 2002-11-17, 09:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<WhiteyFord> z3[n]: you're probably the same person who can't justify spending money on paint for the -outside- of your house...
<live-evil> WhiteyFord the answer to that is leave the case outside and some spray cans near a group of homeboys
<live-evil> it does itself
<WhiteyFord> hahaha... and if you want to get rid of something, just chain it up!

Quote #2861 (+3) [ 2005-07-03, 20:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Skitzo> A Taiwan stock trader mistakenly bought $251 million worth of shares with a misstroke of her computer keyboard, meaning her company is looking at a paper loss of more than $12 million and she is looking for a new job.
<Skitzo> Hahahaha
<Quan-Time> err say what ?
<Quan-Time> how is that possible to "MISTAKE
<Quan-Time> OH FFS
<Quan-Time> fukin teyboard
<Eminoir> just like that :P

Quote #992 (+8) [ 2003-09-03, 09:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<echelon> I got up at 3AM this morning. Had to drive the family to the airport. :rolleyes:
<knowsfords> what kind of duct tape did you use... and did you make sure their tickets to zurich werent return?
<echelon> Zurich? The boxes were stamped HELL.
<echelon> :p
<Falkor[A]> You sent them to england?! you bastard!?! :P

Quote #2699 (+8) [ 2005-04-21, 00:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<the_squid> this channel isnt as entertaining as ugbox makes it out to be

Quote #1204 (+3) [ 2003-10-23, 20:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

*** Lombers[A] (lombers@m041-042.nv.iinet.net.au) Quit (Quit: on fire, bbs)
*** Lombers[A] (lombers@m041-042.nv.iinet.net.au) has joined #overclockers
*** Lombers[A] (lombers@m041-042.nv.iinet.net.au) Quit (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Lombers[A] (lombers@m041-042.nv.iinet.net.au) has joined #overclockers
*** Lombers[A] (lombers@m041-042.nv.iinet.net.au) Quit (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Lombers[A] (lombers@m041-042.nv.iinet.net.au) has joined #overclockers

Quote #3173 (+7) [ 2006-01-06, 14:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Narcolepsy> In the interim, I will eat.
<Narcolepsy> It'll fill in time, and the hole in my stomach.
<Narcolepsy> OMG!
<Narcolepsy> THERE'S A HOLE IN MY STOMACH!
<Narcolepsy> Oh, wait, metaphorical.
<Narcolepsy> nm, calm down.
<Narcolepsy> The boredom goes *POW*

Quote #1130 (+4) [ 2003-10-14, 18:14 ] [ + | - | X ]

<golgy> i wonder if i stick my toe into my 120mm fan, it'll cut my toenails for me
<Daemon> the answer is yes
<golgy> ow
<golgy> no, the answer is no

Quote #1169 (+6) [ 2003-10-19, 19:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<odes> `banlist
<Sparks> dunno
<odes> `listban
<Sparks> `listsluts
<Carrots> lol
<Carrots> dont do that sparks, you'll crash the server

Quote #982 (+59) [ 2003-09-01, 01:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Darkness> How is a BIOS updated?
<Agg> ze flash.
<Agg> if flash goes bad, paperweight you have
<Darkness> Eep.
<Agg> but chance is small
<Darkness> I have NFI what i'm doin, but there is only a few options... It has selected my Board for me, ticked internet update and a button with update new bios..
<Agg> make with the clicking then
<Agg> it's a pretty simple process really
<Darkness> eep. here goes.
<Darkness> done, brb
* Darkness has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)
<Agg> err
<Agg> SMS from darkness
<Agg> PC not restarting :/

Quote #2327 (+9) [ 2004-10-13, 00:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Agg> (omgomgomgi'monircandtalkingtoagirlarealgirlaboutbreasts)

Quote #553 (+11) [ 2003-05-15, 00:55 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Narcolepsy> <Darkness> I'm "fucking" with you.
<Narcolepsy> <Cav> bannanas dont help that :(
* Cav raises an eyebrow
* Darkness quickly hides the box of bananas.
<Darkness> what..?

Quote #68 (+5) [ 2002-11-09, 02:34 ] [ + | - | X ]

<tron|ZzZ> i am stuipted

Quote #4184 (+3) [ 2007-07-13, 22:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<QSC> what is that womens chain of gyms
<Radar> fernwood
<SirPNut> the kitchen ?

Quote #3612 (+18) [ 2006-10-23, 22:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jessica> Agg: I only just saw your "ohmly" pun, and fuck you. I groaned.
<Agg> Jessica - pfft, you've got to stay more current than that.
<Jessica> OH GOD
<Agg> watt?
<aftahours> lol
<sabretooth> I'm here, I'm here
<Jessica> I'm vomiting groans all over the place.
<Agg> my work here is done.
<Agg> (potentially)
* thetron gives Agg a medal
<Jessica> Agg: One of my friends has the following to say
<Jessica> "I laughed really hard at the "watt". That was shockingly good."
<Jessica> me: "SHUT UP"
<Agg> hehe
<Jessica> him: "Sorry, I didn't mean to jolt you like that "
<Agg> tell him to stop arcing on about it.
<Jessica> Me too. People think I'm so down to earth, then bam. Puns.
<TheWedgie> bit of a humour brownout there Agg.
<sabretooth> Oh no.
<Jessica> People think I'm so down to earth, then bam. Puns.
<Jessica> ..yeah.
<Agg> yes, i had an alternate, but i decided to be more direct.
<Jessica> you two need to get a fucking room.
<sabretooth> Everyone, LOOK AWAY
<Jessica> "I'll be generating these things for a while"
<TheWedgie> i guess you could really socket to em though.
* Agg averts his gaze
<Jin-Jah> Agg you're a shocker
<sabretooth> The pun-o-meter's going off the scale
<Jessica> "He oughta be charged for that one"
<sabretooth> Ohh, very good. But GROAN.
<Jessica> "I mean, it had a lot of potential"
<TheWedgie> Jessica - still plugging away eh..
<sabretooth> Agg, she's starting to outpun you.
<Turophile> :)
<Agg> hey, i already used potential! you've blown it, buddy!
<sabretooth> The puns are discharging all over the place.
<Jessica> Really?
<Agg> what are you, anode?
* BTC chases the puns all over the place
<BTC> whoop whoop whoop
<sabretooth> Agg, it was induced out of me.
<aftahours> agg can't resist.
<Asteroid> well that sure sent the conversation flat
<Ashley> IRC: Outlet for insanity.
<sabretooth> I nearly diode.
<aftahours> lol
<TheWedgie> hahahaha
<Agg> it's ok, i've nearly discharged my capacity.
<Asteroid> ooh, resistance
<Turophile> IRC: Outlet of my insanity, inlet of others.
* aftahours steals agg's pot
<sabretooth> Hey I used discharge!
<Jin-Jah> nice triode at a final attempt there
<sabretooth> I'll have to pop a cap in yo ass.
<Asteroid> ooh subtly afta :)
<Agg> i blame Jessica. she LED us all astray.
<V8R[hm]> heh
<Jessica> alrighty
<Bern> YOU lot are revolting
<Asteroid> just cause Agg'solder than us!
<sabretooth> Clearly, she could have short circuited the whole thing and passed this whole mess
<thetron> Bern: Sorry mr sexy pants
<aftahours> <Asteroid> just cause Agg'solder than us! <-- lmao
<sabretooth> Bern: thetron wasn't energised by your pun, clearly.
<TheWedgie> you two sure are generating a lot of puns...
<Agg> we're all a bit excited.
<V8R[hm]> man, you guys are on fire.. my side hertz from the lol
* Shaun rocks out to AC/DC
<Shadey> lol
<Bern> sabretooth: his reply has left me flat
<Asteroid> i used that one
<BradR|Lap> heh
* V8R[hm] gives Bern a wave
* thetron wonders where the world is i386 camera 1 is now
<Agg> and i don't mean to be negative.. but i've got to go to the bank and repay what cathode.
* Asteroid sines out
* Agg bows out
* sabretooth sines a few autographs.
<Asteroid> stop being such squares
<Agg> don't be so inverse.
<BradR|Lap> heh
<V8R[hm]> this is looking terminal
<Cypher`> how far away is the bank as the CRO flys?
<V8R[hm]> lol
<Asteroid> i could cut the tension in here with a sawtooth
<Jin-Jah> hahaha
<BTC> The name is Baud......, James Baud...
<sabretooth> Agg, I don't like your conduct.
<V8R[hm]> try Asteroid, much HT in here
<BradR|Lap> some people are showing really odd sines in here
<BradR|Lap> im worried
<Agg> sabretooth - i'm not here to shroud you from interference.
<BradR|Lap> resistance is futile!
* Asteroid equips RF sheilding
<sabretooth> Agg, but I'll only be here faraday.
* Asteroid transforms
<BTC> Disinformation is not as good as datinformation
<Agg> sabretooth - put it away, fermi.
<Shadey> HAHA
<V8R[hm]> all your base, Asteroid...
<Asteroid> what you say?
<sabretooth> I'm feeling pretty polarised by the whole thing.
* Asteroid PICs up his socks
* Bern calls the coppers
<kelwyn> quit while youre still ahead, sunshine
<sabretooth> Bern: maybe they can amp it up a bit
<Turophile> I'll awp you.
<Bern> I'm sure they can trace the source of the breakout sabretooth
<sabretooth> Damn, I think I'm punned out.
<Shadey> haha
<TheWedgie> suffered a pun blackout sabretooth?
<falkor> sabretooth, i find that impossible to believe
<kelwyn> sabretooth, i told you to quit while you were ahead
<sabretooth> The whole thing's been rather electrifying.
<Bern> if you meditate you can recharge your pun bank
<Turophile> Asteroid: Difuse?
<Turophile> Asteroid: I'll Hue/Saturate you in a minute =
<Bern> follow after me... Ohmmmm, Ohmmm
<sabretooth> I'm quite fluxed.
<Bern> Solder on sabretooth, solder on
<sabretooth> That was used :p
<sabretooth> You shouldn't oscillate around the same words.
<kelwyn> sabretooth stop
<sabretooth> The way you flyback to the same old words just doesn't work!
<kelwyn> you;re getting painful to watch
<sabretooth> Gah!
<sabretooth> But the frequency of the puns is increasing!
<kelwyn> sabz, dont be that guy.
<sabretooth> hEMF. Okay, I'll stop.
* kelwyn stabs sabre

Quote #2104 (+8) [ 2004-07-03, 23:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Mothman): Which sex is the geekiest - how many guys are there compared to girls?
(synik): Are you retarded? It'll be 90% blokes, 10% chicks, and some wise ass like Mitch choosing the Miriam option.

Quote #1788 (+11) [ 2004-03-29, 23:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Ultimata> god my bird is nuts: he just put his head into his bell like a helmet and goes crazy whistling
<b0x> remembering bird nam :p
<Draffa> "Kitty! In the trees!"

Quote #4237 (+7) [ 2007-10-29, 21:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rainwulf> fucking hell, one of my friends has MSN and has a virus that keeps trying to send out infected marriages
<csimpson> an infected marriage would suck
<csimpson> even more than a regular marriage

Quote #1009 (+16) [ 2003-09-07, 22:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowfords> anyone know of one of those puzzle sites that "workout" your brain
<@Frag|Shwr> www.microsoft.com
<@Frag|Shwr> Navigate through it.

Quote #702 (+7) [ 2003-06-26, 19:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Strange1> I got Sea Monkeys!!
<WhiteyFord> sea monkeys? like in the tank?
<Strange1> yeah in the tank
<Strange1> they hatched 2 days ago
<Strange1> when they get big and strong... i'll feed them to my tropical fish
<D_Web> lol

Quote #199 (+11) [ 2002-12-24, 12:42 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Draffa> you're not omnicient, just godlike :D
<stroggos2k> I think you're pretty damm close to allmighty
<Agg> okey dokey.. getting a little stalkerish now..

Quote #2718 (+2) [ 2005-04-28, 10:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

[ canadiant]: Im in love lol. I found a girl that can subnet! :D

Quote #1696 (+7) [ 2004-02-28, 00:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<thetron> MadHatter trying to sell your bogan porn overseas?
<PsychoMatt> haha
<PsychoMatt> orrrr giz a root ayy ya cun
<MadHatter> looking at buying a car actually
<predder> what does MadHatter the mechanic look for in a car
<Agg> spare change

Quote #641 (+19) [ 2003-06-09, 02:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Darmok> years ago, I had an old pc lock up on me..
<Darmok> a 386 or something
<Darmok> I was about to hit ctrl-alt-del
<Darmok> when at the dos prompt.. letters started appearing
<Darmok> h
<Darmok> e
<Darmok> l
<Darmok> l
<Darmok> o
* Darkness sets mode: +b *!*@c16705.frank1.vic.optusnet.com.au
* Darmok was kicked by Darkness (Sierra Tango Foxtrot Uniform! - (Temp Ban/Ignored for 1 Hour :: Kick 195)
<Foos> ahaha
<Lombers> heh
<Rage> heh
<MadHatter> lol
<Foos> he will be impressed.
<Darkness> Oh, was he explaining something?

Quote #275 (+2) [ 2003-01-20, 09:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Enfilade> I'm not a big fan of cars
<Cav> Enfilade: im not a big fan of anal sex, your point?
<Enfilade> What happened?
<Cav> Enfilade: someone forgot to use lube :(

Quote #3206 (+7) [ 2006-01-18, 17:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<D_Web> must be routing problems
<Erve> more lube
<D_Web> thanks wild`
<wild`> np

Quote #2611 (+6) [ 2005-02-25, 19:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

*** Nza has quit IRC (Quit: Apples and oranges aren't that different. Their weight is similar. They both contain acidic elements. They're both spherical. They serve the same purpose. With the exception of a tangerine, I can't think of anything more similiar to an orange than an apple.)
* Reaver hands Nza the Strangest Quit Message award

Quote #2573 (+5) [ 2005-02-07, 11:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<brembo`> dunno what's worse, the music played at work is 50% 80's music... or that I recognize most of the songs from GTA:VC