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Quote #1411 (+4) [ 2003-12-03, 22:15 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Agg wrestles with his digicam, trying to get it to take photos of a shiny, self-illuminating object in a dark room
<fen> agg, please stop taking photos of your willy in a luminous condom :P
<TheWedgie> LOL Agg. glow in the dark vibrator?
<FreeFrag> Agg, we dont want photos of your 4 seasons glow in the dark condom

Quote #2493 (+8) [ 2005-01-14, 09:22 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> carrot, lettuce, tomator
<Crudmuffin> you say tomator, i say tomato

Quote #578 (+12) [ 2003-05-20, 03:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

<bundy> i had a cat lover in the car one day, she goes "hey mark, watch out for that cat on the road", me not realising she was a cat lover said "dont worry, i'll get the fucker" and swung the car towards it

Quote #2274 (+1) [ 2004-09-04, 17:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<tensop> stupid neighbours and their lack of understanding the laws of thermodynamics

Quote #671 (+5) [ 2003-06-15, 15:31 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Charlie^^> God damn i hate employers
<Charlie^^> Especcially when they owe you around 600$
<Charlie^^> And then go so far into debt they have to go to sydney for a few months to get out of back debt
<Trav_> well that's why you don't be someones bitch then

Quote #1806 (+5) [ 2004-04-06, 18:23 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Skitzo> a 15yo girl is being charged as a child pornographer for posting pictures of herself on the net
<Skitzo> WTF>
<DrillSGT> yeah
<DrillSGT> seen it, no pics :/

Quote #2470 (+4) [ 2005-01-06, 11:32 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Srebmol> you know how many g's it takes to kill a HDD that is turned off?
<Srebmol> in fact, you know how many it takes to kill a HDD that's on?
<Redback_> i know
<Srebmol> it's fkn heaps
<Redback_> i reserve the right to paranoia
<Srebmol> I know the swinburne method of killing them tho
<Srebmol> guaranteed to fuck any hdd
<pace> put linux on it?
<Srebmol> rofl
<wild> lmao

Quote #1715 (+8) [ 2004-03-02, 22:42 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Hibba> You know you have problems, when you have 12gb of Iron Chef

Quote #1612 (+5) [ 2004-02-09, 00:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Hunter> sif the red cross needs more donations, all they need do is ask fucking kerry packer to extract some blood from a stone

Quote #2851 (+4) [ 2005-06-27, 10:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Radar> Heh, our goldfish have been sexing each other
<outonanisl> lol
<outonanisl> how can you tell ?
<Mnz|WORK> the male's smoking, the female has a disappointed look on her face...

Quote #4021 (+3) [ 2007-01-26, 11:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Bern> Remote, How do Kiwi's find sheep in long grass?
<Bern> Quite satisfying thank you very much

Quote #111 (+4) [ 2002-11-21, 05:12 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Wolff> i could be gay, ive just never found the right guy

Quote #2625 (+2) [ 2005-03-15, 00:02 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage> haha mad
<Rage> just went squid jigging
<WhiteyAIR> you what?
<wild> ...
<Rage> squid jigging
<Rage> fishing for squid
<wild> wait, 'fishing for squid' could also be taken the wrong way...
<Rage> its funny when you catch 'em and they ink all over the place
<wild> :o

Quote #1604 (+2) [ 2004-02-08, 14:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Cav> yeah, i had an anal teacher, MadHatter
<Decker> so thats where you learnt anal
<Cav> really funny, asshat..
<Decker> you said it
* Decker just caught the pass

Quote #1420 (+8) [ 2003-12-06, 22:31 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@D_Web> Temperature: |CPU #1: 43C, CPU #2: 40C, CPU #1: 3552RPM, CPU #2: 3629RPM, Fan 3: 3629RPM|
<@D_Web> cpu #1 is always 3degrees warmer
<@D_Web> I need to get some decent thermal paste
* Draebor eyes AS5 bigass tube of love
<@Rage> please
<@Rage> keep your ass tubes of love to yourself
<@Rage> dude

Quote #2976 (+9) [ 2005-09-10, 23:18 ] [ + | - | X ]

FatMan: oh god
FatMan: at work tonight
FatMan: coles nightfill, for the uneducated
FatMan: i was filling drinks
FatMan: and the diet light caffeine free pepsi has the code * *** 404.
FatMan: i went "haha 404 contents not found"
FatMan: and then hurt myself for being so geeky.
FatMan: :(

Quote #307 (+9) [ 2003-02-09, 08:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Crudmuffin detaches himself from IRC
* Lurks laughs as Crudmuffin pulls the CAT5 plug from his ass

Quote #1711 (+9) [ 2004-03-01, 21:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@Matt^R> Flatrate Pizza's for $69.95/month*
<@Matt^R> *Greedy People will be subject to prioritization after 3pizzas/day, slowing to 1pizza per day.
<@Matt^R> After 20 pizzas , speeds drop to about 1/2 pizza/day. Underlying Cooking machine load may affect the outcomes of this service.
<@Matt^R> Pizza from Peers-to-Peers, are free, and do not count to your Pizza Total.

Quote #2293 (+8) [ 2004-09-19, 12:40 ] [ + | - | X ]

<eDust> is it talk like a pirate day again?
<CaptWedgie> aye that be correct eDust
<knowsfords> really? man it seems like only a year ago it was talk like a pirate day
<CaptWedgie> and i figured meh, may as well run with it. lol
* CaptWedgie slices knowsfords with his cutlass
<eDust> well then, i'm going ashore to raid the supermarket. back before midnight
<CaptWedgie> hahaha
<knowsfords> yarr I be bleedin' all over me pirate pants
* eDust is now known as eDust_away
* CaptWedgie tosses knowsfords off the UGBow to feed the sharks
* knowsfords uses his hook to sew up the wound with some catgut
<knowsfords> yarr! they don't want to eat a peice of manly leather like myself...
* knowsfords rides the sharks
* knowsfords makes out with his shark wenches
<knowsfords> avast tis a pirates life.
<CaptWedgie> hahaha

Quote #376 (+8) [ 2003-03-04, 21:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Moose> I just called my brother, and he goes "Hello", and I said, ah hey dude what's up, then he goes, "Fuck off, I'm having a wank" then hangs up
<Moose> Disturbing
<Temp0> very disturbing
<Sticks> and I'm sure we could all have lived without that knowledge
<Erve> ...
<Rage> Moose - i'm very sorry i had to read that
<Clay> Moose left hand or right hand?

Quote #1868 (+3) [ 2004-04-23, 10:18 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ace234> fucken hell who keeps giving my email out to 12 and 13 year old girls
<ace234> 6 people have added me in the last 10mins and they are all 12 and 13:S
<Erve> well, treat them like new wine, put them in the cellar for a few years..
<Srebmol> yeah, but if you keep them longer than that they turn to vinegar :P

Quote #513 (+3) [ 2003-04-27, 23:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Belinda> anyone wanna chat to 12/f/denmark
<Belinda> msg me
<thetron> ask manaz
<FreeFrag> Belinda is ~Matt@m084-143.nv.iinet.net.au * Matt <--fucking n00ber
<Manaz> Belinda: This really isn't a channel for that sort of checking. And I'd be amazed if you were actually a 12yo female in Denmark with such a good grasp of colloquial English.
* Z sets mode: +b *!*Matt@*.nv.iinet.net.au
* Belinda was kicked by Z ((Manaz) Idiot)

Quote #2158 (+6) [ 2004-07-19, 10:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Draffa> Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
* Draffa closed the wrong window!
<Draffa> a whole hour of work, GONE!
<wolfeh_> it's ok i have our cyber on logs :D
<Draffa> FUCK!

Quote #4287 (+7) [ 2008-03-25, 21:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

<gords> i happened to walk in to one of our computer labs when a teacher was trying to use one of our new flatbed scanners to scan an artwork made entirely out of chicken wire

Quote #3522 (+2) [ 2006-08-23, 23:16 ] [ + | - | X ]

[23:21] <LomTop> windows was never designed to keep programs running

Quote #538 (+2) [ 2003-05-10, 19:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<klif-e> What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
<Simboo> whether junkz shaves in the morning or not :P

Quote #1476 (+7) [ 2004-01-05, 18:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

(ShadowB|ade) -17:49:35- (Aussie) our private channel was violated :) << but in a good way..
(Aussie) lol
(ShadowB|ade) pfft violated.. you make it sound like a 13yo girl :p

Quote #3265 (+7) [ 2006-02-20, 11:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<BenZ|Work> online dating service. Email. Subject line "Hot left wing liberals waiting for you now"
<BenZ|Work> yay spam
<DemosDemon> LMFAO!
<BenZ|Work> "Oh baby, i disagree with you on that proposition, oh yeah, who's first amendmant's gunna get trampled, yeah, you like that when congress debates, dont you"
<DemosDemon> lmfao
<BenZ|Work> "who's a dirty bill of rights, you are.."

Quote #2485 (+6) [ 2005-01-10, 01:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Daemon> our notes servers are like uni students during o-week
<Agg> going down all the time?

Quote #1923 (+3) [ 2004-05-06, 18:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<TXtoucian> Hey Jeremy, do you know any javascript at all?
<Shaeks> whats a computer?
<TXtoucian> Good answer.

Quote #1198 (+3) [ 2003-10-22, 21:23 ] [ + | - | X ]

<brembo`a> suck my pipe !
<CrashDumy> lol
<DDsD[AaA]> suck MY pipe
<CrashDumy> I'm so glad i didn't get on suck my pipe

Quote #4248 (+1) [ 2007-12-01, 15:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> http://imagestore.ugbox.net/image/XR6Mod_8ff706a439f2d0eb63da6ed.jpg <--That's my bro's nearly legal XR6 engine bay
<S1[A]> "nearly legal" ... I bet that set off Rage's highlight
<brembo`> he's already got the car started

Quote #187 (+1) [ 2002-12-21, 01:58 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sciby> Aaaah, simpsons, is there anything finer?
<Sciby> Maybe a 48 hour non-stop orgasm... but simpsons are a close second.

Quote #838 (+3) [ 2003-08-01, 09:43 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yyk> wow STFU doesn't stand for stuff you, as i thought but rather shut the fuck up... i never knew that[09:50]
<sabz> Heh
<Borg-Sick> LOL
<Borg-Sick> n00b

Quote #2761 (+5) [ 2005-05-17, 16:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

< henrik_z> why the fuck, exactly, do Canon Australia think heavily compressed distorted cockatoo noises playing automatically will make me want to continue looking at their site?
< radish> cos only a galah would buy a canon

Quote #3156 (+11) [ 2005-12-23, 00:12 ] [ + | - | X ]

* FatMan (rofl@CPE-60-226-81-159.qld.bigpond.net.au) has joined #overclockers
<Jessica> Heheh
<Jessica> Yeah.
<Jessica> I got packed full of it.
<FatMan> wtf?
* FatMan (rofl@CPE-60-226-81-159.qld.bigpond.net.au) has left #overclockers

Quote #1433 (+13) [ 2003-12-10, 23:36 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Erve> airforce am teh win
<Tommmo> except the slight issue of having to visit war infested regions
<Erve> there'd be a war over who'd get my cock 1st
<brembo`> weapon of minor proportion

Quote #3051 (+2) [ 2005-10-28, 09:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

oli: any car knowledgable people here?
Grosby: what do you need to know about a car?
oli: ive got a car sitting in the driveway with a jack under one side, and two piles of bricks on the other
oli: a monaro
oli: :(
Grosby: You live in Ipswich?

Quote #1859 (+14) [ 2004-04-19, 18:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ace234> i wish i had a presscott cpu, my oven is stuffed :(

Quote #1925 (+7) [ 2004-05-06, 19:23 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Hunter> holy shit the hot water tank just blew up in our house
<Hunter> BANG
<Hunter> fucking water everywhere
<Agg-> maybe you should sit on IRC and tell everyone about it, Hunter
<Agg-> you know, instead of getting it fixed or cleaning it up or something :)

Quote #1199 (+8) [ 2003-10-22, 22:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> DDsD[AaA] is an obvious terrorist
<wildNngngg> lol
<knowsfords> he has a freind name kaliban... thats almost taliban
<knowsfords> such an obvious link.
<wildNngngg> better call that fridge magnet phone number
<knowsfords> yep
<DDsD[AaA]> Im also a crack dealer in my spare time -> http://imagestore.ugbox.net/images.php?view=566a18870cc8330fead3b9a844f5e0c3
<wildNngngg> go the freaky bulge in the throat :)
<knowsfords> I mean we went to war with evidence less solid
<wildNngngg> LMAO

Quote #3619 (+10) [ 2006-10-30, 11:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Danspec> so how does the MS recorvery console work?
<benz> badly
<Danspec> an answer from someone that isnt a twat?
<BBQ_69> that actually sums it up pretty well
<Danspec> yes well
<Danspec> thats hardly helpful
<BBQ_69> just like the recovery console

Quote #4353 (+3) [ 2008-07-27, 21:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<sg> HAI
<Tank> HAI
<@Wayne> HAI
<Tank> HAI
<glasnt> BAI
<@Wayne> NAI
<@Sniper9300> WAI
<Tank> YAI
<SirPNut> anyway, night guys
<@Wayne> GAI
<brodsta> NOWAI
<@Agg> FISH
<@Agg> wait, what

Quote #826 (+15) [ 2003-07-29, 22:06 ] [ + | - | X ]

<DrillSGT> Nice to see everyone complaining when I am in the chanell .......
<Fodder> drillsgt sucks.
<DrillSGT> thanks Fodder :P
<Lurks> Fodder swallows
<Fodder> anytime
<Fodder> damnit

Quote #2034 (+2) [ 2004-06-06, 12:12 ] [ + | - | X ]

<DrillSGT> THATS RIGHT ASH
<DrillSGT> I HAVE INVADED LIKE A US GENERAL IN NAZI GERMANY!
<TXtoucian> So you got kickbanned?
<DrillSGT> erm . you mean I kicked ass and fucked hot german bitches ;)
<Carl> WTF?
<Carl> Where "hot" == "filthy german bitches beating you with bratwurst"

Quote #3420 (+6) [ 2006-06-28, 15:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<apollo``_> what is a good cloning application?
<Agg> creating an army to take over the world.
<Agg> that's how I'd apply cloning.

Quote #787 (+9) [ 2003-07-15, 23:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

<RoMe`O> my dad filps out knowin dat im goin out wit a girl
<RoMe`O> its like he wants me to b gay

Quote #3560 (+3) [ 2006-09-20, 21:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<benz> There's only one person i kinda want to sleep with atm
<benz> and he's awesome =)

Quote #3155 (+9) [ 2005-12-22, 13:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

* biatch grabs popcorn and watches the ensuing argument ;)
deepspring: go play with ya man boobs biatch :p
* outy pokes biatch with bridgeport the kitten.
* biatch touches her man bewbs.
biatch: Oh baby oh baby
outy: this is hot
outy: keep going biatch
outy: im nearly done....
deepspring: lol
biatch: Work on your stamina, outy.

Quote #1402 (+9) [ 2003-11-30, 19:09 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Largo) was it koreans that ate cats and dogs long time ago
(Largo) ?
(Cija) They still do.
(Largo) so thats why they like hello kitty so much