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Quote #1479 (+3) [ 2004-01-06, 10:41 ] [ + | - | X ]

<i386> dear god..... Microsoft Windows XP used upnp to plot with my other home appliances and white goods and they are comming to kill me
<i386> Ive baracaded myself in my room, with serveral cans of tuna
<i386> THE TOAST, IT BURNS!

Quote #2704 (+6) [ 2005-04-23, 13:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yaleman> some guy in a wheelchair got hit by a taxi in the valley the other day
<yaleman> was rolling around yelling " I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs!"
<CapnChron> hahahahahahahaha
<yaleman> well, the first bit is true, the second half I added for funny value

Quote #2308 (+7) [ 2004-09-28, 22:10 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Junkz> only 2 things smell like fish
<Junkz> and one of them is fish

Quote #2655 (+10) [ 2005-03-30, 00:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

[ rjbs]: WHO ARE YOU PEOPL!?!
[ DaveQB]: lol
[ dstate2]: rjbs, i am your father
[ rjbs]: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
[ rjbs]: Can I borrow the car?

Quote #1795 (+2) [ 2004-04-01, 12:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

<inf3rn0> dan is better looking than Agg

Quote #1586 (+4) [ 2004-02-03, 19:22 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Erve is now known as Erve|run
<Rik_> you've got the runs?
<Rik_> :s
<Erve|run> yup, need to exercise my fatty arse
<Rik_> wipe 2 3 4
<Rik_> wipe 2 3 4
<Rik_> and flush
<Rik_> and flush
<Rik_> and flush
<Rik_> and flush
<Rik_> now pickup your pants and get moving!
<Erve|run> and push that plunger

Quote #2788 (+6) [ 2005-05-26, 21:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@Falkor> how come the fat guy on lost isn't losing any weight
<Freaek> he's eating the dead bodies
<@Falkor> lol
<Rage> haha
<TheWedgie> haha

Quote #54 (+3) [ 2002-11-06, 05:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rudeboi> oh yes.. i just love being associated with someone who's pinned as being a poofter... *does a little dance of joy*
<Cav> your all just jealous that i aint a poofter and that you cant have my sexy body :)
<Rudeboi> after some grotty 900yo aliens have stuck their fingers up ur arse, methinks not...

Quote #1278 (+6) [ 2003-11-04, 22:25 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Draebor hands DDsD a hashcookie
<DDsD> pfft hash?
<DDsD> hash is for n00bs :p
<DDsD> How about a cokecookie? =D

Quote #2567 (+2) [ 2005-02-05, 09:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<mazzanet> i want a tribe of 30 south american monkeys.
<Mred32> Didn't you say you already had a large family?

Quote #3503 (+3) [ 2006-08-09, 16:32 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jason|PHL> i don't dig machines.
<Andy6Days> I don't dig graves.
<Andy6Days> On Wednesdays.

Quote #2855 (+7) [ 2005-06-29, 09:23 ] [ + | - | X ]

<outy> extra bogan++ points for working in the rain, stomping mud through the house, and wearing no socks (i ran out of socks!)
<knowsfords> lies, bogans are afraid of the rain
<knowsfords> it reminds them too heavily of showering
<Warhamster> bogans melt in the rain.... "geez mate, a clear non alcoholic liquid.. we're fucked!"

Quote #699 (+13) [ 2003-06-25, 22:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Quilb shakes head at the level of conversation. its not even 2am yet
* Darkness puts hand to ear. And this just in, Fuck you, Quilb. Thanks, tom!

Quote #4139 (+10) [ 2007-06-03, 19:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<wayne> damn ubuntu resetting my DNA
<Shaun> wayne: Ubuntu does gene therapy now?
<wayne> heh, DNS

Quote #1321 (+4) [ 2003-11-13, 23:46 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Mitch> i have 1x 2.6Ghz Celeron, 1x 1.6Ghz AMD AP, 1x AMD 2Ghz XP. Now
<mpot> good for you
<Hyrax> <Mitch> <---- My hero
<mpot> no, he can't be.....he's MY hero
* lathiat chops mitch in half
* mpot goes off to sulk, cos he doesn't want to share his hero....
* lathiat gives half to mpot
* lathiat gives half to Hyrax
<Mitch> please.... not that half

Quote #155 (+5) [ 2002-12-11, 06:44 ] [ + | - | X ]

<bobSNEE> dont you hate it when you accidently break your mobo while inserting ram :(
<Manaz> bob: You're not supposed to use a hammer!

Quote #1729 (+7) [ 2004-03-07, 12:19 ] [ + | - | X ]

<H6D617A7A6> lo \Roscoe, D_Web
<\Roscoe\> I think my drivers license number just said hello to me.
<gayfrog> :O
<H6D617A7A6> haha
<TheWedgie> LOL

Quote #524 (+36) [ 2003-05-04, 21:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Erve|afk> it's like a koala bear crapped a rainbow in my brain
<WhiteyFord> sensational

Quote #1177 (+5) [ 2003-10-20, 17:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Tate): mmmm cork
(Tate): I mean
(Tate): mmmm sarah
(Trav): cork?!
(Tate): cork
(Tate): on a bottle
(Tate): you know
(Trav): ewww you sick fetish boy
(Tate): CORK NOT CAWK
(Tate): :P
(Tate): different spelling
(Trav): tate a cork and a cawk, both would go the same place for you
(bundy): LOL
(Tate): hhahahaa

Quote #3145 (+4) [ 2005-12-17, 13:11 ] [ + | - | X ]

<macmate> i need you to twiddle your thumbs with me
<macmate> i can't do it alone

Quote #1338 (+1) [ 2003-11-15, 22:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<aftahours> haha you know you have your music up loud when your neighbour 1 block away says on msn: "omg i love that song"

Quote #530 (+6) [ 2003-05-05, 23:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Firemoth> Cav, I've tried rubbing it.. doesn't work.

Quote #1005 (+1) [ 2003-09-07, 13:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Sciby> thetron: Use your brain. The choppers in DC are apaches. Stop looking at the fucking rotors and look at the actual chopper and you'll see they're two different things. Not only were you dropped on the head as a child, but your parents dribbled you down the court for a 2 point lay-up.

Quote #639 (+6) [ 2003-06-08, 19:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<z3[n]> ur just a kid urself
<FreeFrag> IT'S SPELT YOU FOR FUCKS SAKE
<Narcolepsy> *your...
<Gibbon> hehe
<VooDoo> lol

Quote #1607 (+4) [ 2004-02-08, 18:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Erve> !google bastards
<D_Web> Result: SCO | SCO Grows Your Business - [ http://www.sco.com/ ]

Quote #4234 (+6) [ 2007-10-24, 00:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jessica> Can I just ask a vague question
<Jessica> How many orgasms have you guys had in one day, like.. maximum?
<devians_> zed is dead baby, zed is dead
<brodsta> ....
<sabretooth> :o
<Jessica> Just out of the blue
<nb-au> lol
<Jessica> Like out of interest
<sabretooth> So yeah *cough* back to sliding cars around
<takai[l]> 200mm f1.8s arnt $7000
<sabretooth> The one I saw one eBay was going for about that after currency conversion (GBP)

Quote #1888 (+10) [ 2004-04-28, 01:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<PolishMani> i didnt think it would be this hard to find a foos ball table in Australia...an el cheapo one
<@Agg> I pity the foos.

Quote #404 (+3) [ 2003-03-18, 05:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Fodder> just tell them you're giggling about a pinata filled with dead kittens
<cSmith> i am too buddy :P

Quote #3910 (+3) [ 2006-12-23, 20:42 ] [ + | - | X ]

* @VooDoo- keeps looking for someone trustworthy in Sydney
<@sabretooth> VooDoo-: benz
<Shaun> hahahahahahaha

Quote #2058 (+4) [ 2004-06-14, 21:05 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Carrots> but your just a script kiddie
<SoulReap> scripts my ass
*** SoulReap Quit (Exit: ( www.nnscript.de :: NoNameScript 3.73 :: www.XLhost.de ))

Quote #3049 (+3) [ 2005-10-27, 20:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Hunter> bloody monkeysuit uniforms. you guys know how hot it is working in IT with a bloody tie
<DeadlyDude> going into town with a suit on is teh win tho
<Hunter> had to supervise an erection today
<Hunter> it wasnt a big one

Quote #1129 (+5) [ 2003-10-14, 15:22 ] [ + | - | X ]

<biatch> great sab! now the entire of ocau can see my sexy cellulite folds!
<biatch> jesus!
<echelon> biatch is folding for ocau!
<Tapek> lol
<echelon> :P
<sabz> haha
<yale_work> rofl
<Iroquois> hehe :D
<biatch> dead sexeh.

Quote #1737 (+8) [ 2004-03-09, 23:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Nozz> damnit, penisland.com is still down
<Nozz> how am I ever going to know whether its a site about pens or penises?

Quote #913 (+1) [ 2003-08-15, 22:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

* knowsfords pats Rik on the head and gives him a chocolate chip cookie
* Rik pats knowsfords and gives him head

Quote #3276 (+2) [ 2006-03-04, 11:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

<WedgieAFK> sure you can do without it, it's still a 'want' rather than a 'need'
<@Laninoir> like anal
* eraserwk its a need

Quote #3124 (+17) [ 2005-12-06, 21:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> How on earth do I disable this spawn of fucking satan bullshit called the office clipboard - I want to COPY and then PASTE - I dont want this shit to think for itself and remember by last 73 fucking copies then paste the wrong fucking thing JESUS CHRIST MICROSOFT JUST MAKE IT EASY
<BBQ_69> FreeFrag, it looks like your writing a letter..

Quote #1380 (+12) [ 2003-11-26, 18:33 ] [ + | - | X ]

(@Agg) this spam reckons i can have "an erection that lasts all weekend" .. am i the only one who sees some serious problems with that?
(Squigy) awsome
(Reaver) no, weekend long erections own
(gords) i can imagine it'd be a bit of a problem. better not reply to that one, Agg
(@Agg) you do a handstand when you want to take a piss?
(Largo) or poke an eye out
(zebu) yeah its all good till you need to go to the store and buy some milk
(jimiw) Quadbox: it's not that bad, i saw it about a month ago
(Squigy) lol
(Squigy) it comes in handy as a towel rack

Quote #4263 (+3) [ 2008-01-22, 19:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jin-Jah> outy if i were to foray into the rotary, are they easy to fix when they break? just looking at the housings, it's almost as if the most effort in pulling the engine apart would be unbolting the gearbox and ancillaries
<outy> Jin-Jah if you fuck an apex seal, or any of the other seals then the engine has to come apart
<Henk> yea I know
<outy> its like a sandwhich
<outy> you cant remove the tomato without taking off the bread
<Tabris_> who the fuck would put a tomato sandwich in an engine?

Quote #343 (+10) [ 2003-02-16, 21:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<kermie> vi, that like a latin language?

Quote #2822 (+3) [ 2005-06-14, 23:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@CapnChron> wtf
<@CapnChron> chicks play Everquest 2 now??
<@CapnChron> I smsed a chick for a root
<@CapnChron> her reply "can't, playing everquest 2"

Quote #2812 (+7) [ 2005-06-03, 16:12 ] [ + | - | X ]

<outonanisl> haha, people who dont realise what they are saying on msn
<outonanisl> Jess says:
<outonanisl> if you're bored, pack my shit
<outonanisl> im bored says:
<outonanisl> bend over then
<Agg> fascinating, do go on

Quote #1320 (+3) [ 2003-11-13, 23:45 ] [ + | - | X ]

<mpot> hmm.... ":q" doesn't work when trying to exit an ssh prompt ;-)
<Radix> funny that.. neither does ZZ :)

Quote #3106 (+8) [ 2005-11-24, 20:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

[nbound] how do you make a quit message anyway????
[modafroman] slash guit message
[FatMan] nbound: handy thing called the tools -> options
[mazzanet] nbound: type /quit [message]
[mazzanet] and it'll store your message
[FatMan] ^^ or that
[mazzanet] so when you /quit next, your message will appear
[nbound] yeah i couldnt find it in options
[nbound] message goes in []'s?
[mazzanet] no
[mazzanet] well you can if you want
[nbound] okiez :)
[ace234] what you put afet /quit will be in your quit message
Quit: [nbound] [XXXXX@202.22.161.130] [Quit: Disconnecting from the Matrix.....]
FatMan high-5's mazzanet
[FatMan] well played.
[mazzanet] hah!
Join: [nbound] [XXXXX@202.22.161.130]
[nbound] did it work?
[nbound] lol
[mazzanet] no
[ace234] try alt + z
[mazzanet] you better do it again
Part: [nbound] [XXXXX@202.22.161.130]
[Azrael] lol
[Bern] hahaha
mazzanet hi-5s ace234
[bungs] hehe
Join: [nbound] [XXXXX@202.22.161.130]
[Shaun] You guys are mean.
[nbound] dammit
[nbound] whoever said that
FatMan straightens up his halo
[ace234] hmm try /raw server quit <message here>
[mazzanet] nbound: try /server quitmsg [message]
[mazzanet] ...which is the same as ace234's
[mazzanet] you don't need the /raw
Quit: [nbound] [XXXXX@202.22.161.130] [Quit]
[ace234] hehe
[Azrael] Lol
[bungs] :)
[ace234] mazzanet but it makes it harder to understand for the n00bs so they do it anyway
[mazzanet] /raw server doesn't do anything...
Join: [nbound] [XXXXX@202.22.161.130]
[nbound] okiez that definately didnt work
[ace234] it does, it just passes everything after the /raw straight to the server
[nbound] it tried to connect to a server called quitmsg
[mazzanet] and 'server' isn't a valid command, so nothing will happen
[[nbound] im using mIRC if that helps
[mazzanet] oh
[mazzanet] you need to get an operator to set it then
[mazzanet] type /join 0,#help
Part: [nbound] [XXXXX@202.22.161.130]
[FatMan] hahaha
[ace234] haw haw
[Bern] lolol
[ace234] this has to be ugboxed

Quote #831 (+4) [ 2003-07-31, 15:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Carrots> K1 wants his next GF to be dumb as a post
<Bleeter> ek, i'd be going other direction then. at least two brain cells please
<Carrots> yeah.. me too.. I want a gf who is atleast a bit of a challenge at 2 player games
<INerTIal> lol
<RoSWeLL> lol
<Bleeter> i'd like a GF who'd actually not run away @ the thought of playing a comp game
* INerTIal nods
<INerTIal> that would be nice i must admit
<Bleeter> i mean, just ONCE
<RoSWeLL> if u find one Bleeter let me know
<head_rush> lol, no way I want a gf that has NFI about computers
<head_rush> So like after a hard day at work
<head_rush> We can just have mad sex0r
<wry> my ex gf played comp games
<wry> we even played rpg games (book based + card based)
<head_rush> Like if they are better at a computer game than me
<head_rush> Thats just fucked
<head_rush> OMFG
<head_rush> YOUR GF WAS A FUCKING NERD

Quote #996 (+11) [ 2003-09-04, 22:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Chastity> there was a netsplit once.. and I got ops in #christian! it was the coolest day of my life

Quote #4008 (+3) [ 2007-01-13, 17:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Shaun> Look I'm sure he'd manage to do it.
<Shaun> [17:27:32] -!- Irssi: [ @Sciby ] [sciby@138.77.43.69 ]
<Shaun> Er.
<Shaun> Stupid putty.
<mazzanet> s/putty/user/
<Shaun> Want me to see how many times I've seen you say "stupid putty"?
<mazzanet> now with a new mouse with better tactileness is hard to accidently right click
<mazzanet> <!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Transitional//EN" "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-transitional.dtd">
<mazzanet> <html dir="ltr" lang="en">
<mazzanet> er
<mazzanet> shut up.

Quote #770 (+1) [ 2003-07-11, 04:17 ] [ + | - | X ]

(ernest): he can be shadow hymen affairs minister
(cSmith): haha
(Darkness): Isn't that like a priest?
(Darkness): Oh wait, boys don't have hymens.

Quote #1980 (+5) [ 2004-05-19, 21:37 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Hibba kicks google
<remote_man> why kick google?
<remote_man> Hibba: i'd be careful kicking google in here
<remote_man> google is irc's version fo the bible

Quote #2075 (+5) [ 2004-06-23, 21:36 ] [ + | - | X ]

<@sniperA64> DOOM3 coming 03-08-04
<Crudmuffin> sniperA64: You dont' mean coming 03-04-08?
<@Manaz> Nah, that's HL2
<Crudmuffin> you mean they're not the same game?
<Crudmuffin> :)
<@Manaz> Don't even ask about Duke Nukem Forever :P
<enigma> damnit, manaz beat me

Quote #1604 (+2) [ 2004-02-08, 14:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Cav> yeah, i had an anal teacher, MadHatter
<Decker> so thats where you learnt anal
<Cav> really funny, asshat..
<Decker> you said it
* Decker just caught the pass