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Quote #2668 (+1) [ 2005-04-04, 20:57 ] [ + | - | X ]

<knowsfords> okay thats it... someone help me invent a new cheap internet protocol that can be used with existing infrastructure and can be used from 300kms away
<eDust> knowsfords, v92 dialup meets that criteria
<TheWedgie> heheheheh
<knowsfords> eDust: is it fast?
<TheWedgie> owned
<knowsfords> IS IT!
<TheWedgie> faster than v.34
<eDust> my first modem was 2400 baud, so yeah it's fast knowsfords :P

Quote #2120 (+4) [ 2004-07-08, 19:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

<mazzanet> oh shit
<mazzanet> the VCR is smoking
<mazzanet> brb
<remote_man> rofl
<Bern> tell it smoking will stunt it's growth
<kizzap> didn't your mother ever tell you not to pass joints

Quote #208 (+2) [ 2002-12-24, 08:32 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Lurks> K|dDO: come down to melbourne, they have been seen roaming the streets down here
<dspringau> Lurks: tasmanians aren't wild life

Quote #2621 (+2) [ 2005-03-10, 16:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Borg> anyone remember a poll showing the age demographic of OCAU ?
<Agg> "how old are you?" in the pub
<Agg> iirc
<Borg> The following words are either very common, too long, or too short and were not included in your search : how, old, are, you
<sabretooth> haha
<Agg> rofl

Quote #4249 (+1) [ 2007-12-03, 23:09 ] [ + | - | X ]

<fen> You learn something new everyday.. today i learnt that the governemnt can jail you and take your wages/house/drivers license/car if you dont pay a parking fine for 4 months. It all nicely laid out in the enforcement order they mailed me saying payup by 22nd of december or your fucked.
<Stygian> hah
* GSlicer has quit (Ping timeout)
* BTC is now known as BedTC|Zzz
* lurks2 is now known as Lurks
<fen> i think i'll pay it now..

Quote #930 (+3) [ 2003-08-19, 21:49 ] [ + | - | X ]

<BobsYourUncle> my damn fly keeps unzipping itself
<Ros`away> sure its not your hand bob ?

Quote #842 (+4) [ 2003-08-02, 06:40 ] [ + | - | X ]

*** Joins: ColdFusion (azza@076.a.003.pth.iprimus.net.au)
* ColdFusion is away: CS
*** ColdFusion is now known as ColdFu[CS]
* ColdFu[CS] is away: CounterStrike @210.50.4.17:27015 (iPGN CS 1.5 Arson)
*** ColdFu[CS] is now known as ColdFu|CS
* ColdFu|CS is away: CounterStrike @203.24.101.84:27015 (EFTel West CS 1.5 #7)
*** ColdFu|CS was kicked by Darkness (Darkness is here: STFU@203.24.101.84:27015 (You)- (Kick : 213)

Quote #3507 (-7) [ 2006-08-12, 20:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FunkyBob> hmm... $17.50 for a veal parma....
<kosh> another $5 for a hand job!
<kosh> Lunchtime special

Quote #4091 (+9) [ 2007-04-25, 15:15 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Dopefish`> I've only heard of it happening a few times and one story involved ecstasy taking and going crazy with about 8 liters of water or so
<LemMinG> good old dihydrogen monoxide
<Wayne> hydroxic acid
<Wayne> hydrogen hydroxide
<Tabris> sky juice :P

Quote #3612 (+18) [ 2006-10-23, 22:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Jessica> Agg: I only just saw your "ohmly" pun, and fuck you. I groaned.
<Agg> Jessica - pfft, you've got to stay more current than that.
<Jessica> OH GOD
<Agg> watt?
<aftahours> lol
<sabretooth> I'm here, I'm here
<Jessica> I'm vomiting groans all over the place.
<Agg> my work here is done.
<Agg> (potentially)
* thetron gives Agg a medal
<Jessica> Agg: One of my friends has the following to say
<Jessica> "I laughed really hard at the "watt". That was shockingly good."
<Jessica> me: "SHUT UP"
<Agg> hehe
<Jessica> him: "Sorry, I didn't mean to jolt you like that "
<Agg> tell him to stop arcing on about it.
<Jessica> Me too. People think I'm so down to earth, then bam. Puns.
<TheWedgie> bit of a humour brownout there Agg.
<sabretooth> Oh no.
<Jessica> People think I'm so down to earth, then bam. Puns.
<Jessica> ..yeah.
<Agg> yes, i had an alternate, but i decided to be more direct.
<Jessica> you two need to get a fucking room.
<sabretooth> Everyone, LOOK AWAY
<Jessica> "I'll be generating these things for a while"
<TheWedgie> i guess you could really socket to em though.
* Agg averts his gaze
<Jin-Jah> Agg you're a shocker
<sabretooth> The pun-o-meter's going off the scale
<Jessica> "He oughta be charged for that one"
<sabretooth> Ohh, very good. But GROAN.
<Jessica> "I mean, it had a lot of potential"
<TheWedgie> Jessica - still plugging away eh..
<sabretooth> Agg, she's starting to outpun you.
<Turophile> :)
<Agg> hey, i already used potential! you've blown it, buddy!
<sabretooth> The puns are discharging all over the place.
<Jessica> Really?
<Agg> what are you, anode?
* BTC chases the puns all over the place
<BTC> whoop whoop whoop
<sabretooth> Agg, it was induced out of me.
<aftahours> agg can't resist.
<Asteroid> well that sure sent the conversation flat
<Ashley> IRC: Outlet for insanity.
<sabretooth> I nearly diode.
<aftahours> lol
<TheWedgie> hahahaha
<Agg> it's ok, i've nearly discharged my capacity.
<Asteroid> ooh, resistance
<Turophile> IRC: Outlet of my insanity, inlet of others.
* aftahours steals agg's pot
<sabretooth> Hey I used discharge!
<Jin-Jah> nice triode at a final attempt there
<sabretooth> I'll have to pop a cap in yo ass.
<Asteroid> ooh subtly afta :)
<Agg> i blame Jessica. she LED us all astray.
<V8R[hm]> heh
<Jessica> alrighty
<Bern> YOU lot are revolting
<Asteroid> just cause Agg'solder than us!
<sabretooth> Clearly, she could have short circuited the whole thing and passed this whole mess
<thetron> Bern: Sorry mr sexy pants
<aftahours> <Asteroid> just cause Agg'solder than us! <-- lmao
<sabretooth> Bern: thetron wasn't energised by your pun, clearly.
<TheWedgie> you two sure are generating a lot of puns...
<Agg> we're all a bit excited.
<V8R[hm]> man, you guys are on fire.. my side hertz from the lol
* Shaun rocks out to AC/DC
<Shadey> lol
<Bern> sabretooth: his reply has left me flat
<Asteroid> i used that one
<BradR|Lap> heh
* V8R[hm] gives Bern a wave
* thetron wonders where the world is i386 camera 1 is now
<Agg> and i don't mean to be negative.. but i've got to go to the bank and repay what cathode.
* Asteroid sines out
* Agg bows out
* sabretooth sines a few autographs.
<Asteroid> stop being such squares
<Agg> don't be so inverse.
<BradR|Lap> heh
<V8R[hm]> this is looking terminal
<Cypher`> how far away is the bank as the CRO flys?
<V8R[hm]> lol
<Asteroid> i could cut the tension in here with a sawtooth
<Jin-Jah> hahaha
<BTC> The name is Baud......, James Baud...
<sabretooth> Agg, I don't like your conduct.
<V8R[hm]> try Asteroid, much HT in here
<BradR|Lap> some people are showing really odd sines in here
<BradR|Lap> im worried
<Agg> sabretooth - i'm not here to shroud you from interference.
<BradR|Lap> resistance is futile!
* Asteroid equips RF sheilding
<sabretooth> Agg, but I'll only be here faraday.
* Asteroid transforms
<BTC> Disinformation is not as good as datinformation
<Agg> sabretooth - put it away, fermi.
<Shadey> HAHA
<V8R[hm]> all your base, Asteroid...
<Asteroid> what you say?
<sabretooth> I'm feeling pretty polarised by the whole thing.
* Asteroid PICs up his socks
* Bern calls the coppers
<kelwyn> quit while youre still ahead, sunshine
<sabretooth> Bern: maybe they can amp it up a bit
<Turophile> I'll awp you.
<Bern> I'm sure they can trace the source of the breakout sabretooth
<sabretooth> Damn, I think I'm punned out.
<Shadey> haha
<TheWedgie> suffered a pun blackout sabretooth?
<falkor> sabretooth, i find that impossible to believe
<kelwyn> sabretooth, i told you to quit while you were ahead
<sabretooth> The whole thing's been rather electrifying.
<Bern> if you meditate you can recharge your pun bank
<Turophile> Asteroid: Difuse?
<Turophile> Asteroid: I'll Hue/Saturate you in a minute =
<Bern> follow after me... Ohmmmm, Ohmmm
<sabretooth> I'm quite fluxed.
<Bern> Solder on sabretooth, solder on
<sabretooth> That was used :p
<sabretooth> You shouldn't oscillate around the same words.
<kelwyn> sabretooth stop
<sabretooth> The way you flyback to the same old words just doesn't work!
<kelwyn> you;re getting painful to watch
<sabretooth> Gah!
<sabretooth> But the frequency of the puns is increasing!
<kelwyn> sabz, dont be that guy.
<sabretooth> hEMF. Okay, I'll stop.
* kelwyn stabs sabre

Quote #223 (0) [ 2003-01-01, 09:35 ] [ + | - | X ]

*** Cav has left #rice
*** Cav has joined #rice
<Cav> whoops
<Cav> wtf did i click then
<Narcolepsy> "wrong button"...
<Narcolepsy> It's like the 'wrong hole' error of IRC..

Quote #2851 (+2) [ 2005-06-27, 10:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Radar> Heh, our goldfish have been sexing each other
<outonanisl> lol
<outonanisl> how can you tell ?
<Mnz|WORK> the male's smoking, the female has a disappointed look on her face...

Quote #2396 (+7) [ 2004-11-22, 13:47 ] [ + | - | X ]

(Tensop): the only reason people watch anime is because they'd get caught perving at 14 year olds in school uniforms fighting robots anywhere else

Quote #1359 (0) [ 2003-11-18, 23:47 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Daemon> gah, fuck linux blows
<CoRDWoRK> really?
<CoRDWoRK> cool, might install it then

Quote #946 (+4) [ 2003-08-23, 08:16 ] [ + | - | X ]

(mazzanet): mornin
(Darkness): gah, fuck.
(Darkness): Why did i drink so much and stay out so late..
(Darkness): urrggg
(INerTIal): lol
(INerTIal): always the problem
(INerTIal): the answer is always cause i drunk too much
(Darkness): Yes, but in 30 mins i have to be at the fire station being all co-ordinated and stuff... I feel like there was a party in my mouth, and everyone was projectile vomitting!
(INerTIal): lmao

Quote #123 (+4) [ 2002-11-25, 04:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<sniper1400> What's the most useless thing in sport?
<Daemon> sniper1400: clothing in the women's volleyball? :)
<sniper1400> more like clothing in any womens sport

Quote #1101 (-3) [ 2003-10-10, 21:08 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Carrots> oh... ah, what the hell, I need sex, bring her on.. just shave her beard first
<RoSWeLL> your a brave man

Quote #1821 (+1) [ 2004-04-11, 19:30 ] [ + | - | X ]

<biatchx> Not really. sab isn't really welcome here. I'm not allowed visitors.
<PooJou> biatchx: are you in jail?
<biatchx> I live with my Dad yeah.
<biatchx> Only because it's convenient.

Quote #1422 (+15) [ 2003-12-07, 13:13 ] [ + | - | X ]

<brembo`> how ya bike going FF ?
<FreeFrag> Good...my ass gets sore though :p
<brembo`> use the seat

Quote #311 (+4) [ 2003-02-11, 10:21 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Dedge looks at the satellite on his roof
<Gibbon> dude, you're lucky it didn't flatten the place when it landed

Quote #699 (+13) [ 2003-06-25, 22:50 ] [ + | - | X ]

* Quilb shakes head at the level of conversation. its not even 2am yet
* Darkness puts hand to ear. And this just in, Fuck you, Quilb. Thanks, tom!

Quote #784 (0) [ 2003-07-15, 20:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Firemoth> I'm back, and I bare gifts!
<Agg-> bear
<sabretooth> Ewwww
<Agg-> we don't want your naked "gifts"
<Firemoth> rofl
<sabretooth> Well get some pants and cover up your gifts.
<Daemon> naked gifts?
<Firemoth> oops

Quote #3407 (+4) [ 2006-06-16, 13:45 ] [ + | - | X ]

<FreeFrag> OK, I've turned into a real mac user
<FreeFrag> I bought this MacBook without knowing for positive what the specs were.
<FreeFrag> Hah, there's only one button on this laptop

Quote #9 (+15) [ 2002-10-21, 06:35 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Rage-sifnt> ffs, i have a WHOLE cow stuck in my braces
<othy> Rage-sifnt, i can think of worse places to have a whole cow stuck
<knowsfords> othy: in a barn?

Quote #3077 (-1) [ 2005-11-10, 18:32 ] [ + | - | X ]

<jigme> oops. I'm supposed to be cooking rice not looking at bukkake
<jigme> damnit

Quote #2896 (+1) [ 2005-07-24, 21:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Trenton> hey tim tim
<Eminoir> hello
<Trenton> i need ur assistance
<Trenton> aka. full help
<Trenton> i dont know how to setup thunderbird for gmail
<Eminoir> tried google?
<Trenton> how do i try google?

Quote #2783 (+1) [ 2005-05-24, 13:29 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yaleman_> mornin' all
<SG123[Uni]> it's nearly 1pm, hardly morning
<yaleman_> it's morning if I only just had breakfast.
<SG123[Uni]> damnit, space time doesnt bend itself around to suit you!

Quote #2647 (+2) [ 2005-03-25, 19:54 ] [ + | - | X ]

<n00dle> that was really wierd
<n00dle> i was having a ciggy in my usual spot
<n00dle> at the top of the street
<n00dle> and got to the house and dad is standing in front of the door
<n00dle> and im like 'oh fuck.'
<n00dle> he walks up to me and im like 'hi..'
<n00dle> and he motions for me to give him my hand
<n00dle> so i do
<n00dle> and he dumps something in my hand
<n00dle> and im like er... and he goes 'pretzels!'
<n00dle> and walks off
<n00dle> ...

Quote #4086 (+11) [ 2007-04-23, 20:39 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Lits> anyhoo, register or i'll cut off your thumbs
<biatch> you can have 'em!
<biatch> they're useless anyway
<Lits> like your boobs?
<biatch> >:|
<Lits> o.o
* Lits runs
<biatch> boobs? useless?
<Lits> and i quote
<Lits> <biatch> pfft. the boobs, they do nothing for me! | <Lits> i bet they'd just get in the way | <biatch> they do
<biatch> what the. where'd that come from?
<Shaun> Looks like he keeps record of whenever you talk about your breasts.
<Lits> a convo some time ago
<Shaun> Rather creepy.
<biatch> how'd you get it so quickly?
[20:42] <Lits> i keep records of any time anyone talks about breasts

Quote #1098 (+3) [ 2003-10-09, 22:53 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Tastic> hi-5 was my second favourite show when i was single
<Tastic> my girlfriend wont let me watch it anymore
<Tastic> "but baby, I only watch it to learn new things that humprey could never have tought me"
<biatch> that's a little disturbing, Tastic
<yale_work> lol Tastic
<Chamelion> lmao @ tastic

Quote #1510 (+6) [ 2004-01-12, 01:28 ] [ + | - | X ]

<ernnotZZzz> http://marsrovers.nasa.gov/gallery/press/spirit/20040106a/PIA04995_br2.jpg proof that aliens exist on mars........
<Fod> it takes superior intelligence to craft a desert that boring?

Quote #2627 (+4) [ 2005-03-15, 17:48 ] [ + | - | X ]

<brembo`> we have ducted vacuuming
<brembo`> and ducted aircon, but both are rather neglected they only 50% work
<TheWedgie> so your house both sucks & blows?

Quote #1157 (+2) [ 2003-10-18, 22:04 ] [ + | - | X ]

<mazzanet> [22:01] * Agg (agg@203.173.27.67) Quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer) <----oh noes Agg got assinated by peer
<FreeFrag> he got hit by a deer?
<Redback> that should be aggs quit message
<Redback> Connection reset by deer
<afta|shwr> ahhhaah
<mazzanet> lol

Quote #215 (-4) [ 2002-12-30, 12:40 ] [ + | - | X ]

<dj-studd> tip of the day: Don't have sex with the baked bean can
<Cav> we did :)

Quote #600 (+5) [ 2003-05-27, 21:51 ] [ + | - | X ]

<cRyStAl> does mirc have tafe courses to become an op??????

Quote #1772 (+8) [ 2004-03-26, 00:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Owen> WINDOWS IS SO SHIT THAT I USE IT ALL THE TIME ON MY TWO COMPUTERS AT HOME
<Owen> BUT DON'T FORGET THAT I REALLY DO HATE IT

Quote #2704 (+6) [ 2005-04-23, 13:27 ] [ + | - | X ]

<yaleman> some guy in a wheelchair got hit by a taxi in the valley the other day
<yaleman> was rolling around yelling " I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs!"
<CapnChron> hahahahahahahaha
<yaleman> well, the first bit is true, the second half I added for funny value

Quote #4300 (+2) [ 2008-04-19, 21:52 ] [ + | - | X ]

<The_Dan> I love UGBox
<The_Dan> I really really do

Quote #4190 (+3) [ 2007-07-22, 16:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Stygian> USB guitar is incredibly vague.
<Stygian> Wow! Signal output to USB! What a revelation!
<QSC> Stygian: why dou always have to have such a negative attitude
<Stygian> QSC: Because there's really nothing to get excited about?
<QSC> Stygian: Get a girlfriend, she'll help you
<Stygian> I have a positive output on things when it's due.
<Stygian> Also. Who the christ are you to make assumptions on whether or not I have a girlfriend?
<QSC> oh dude it's obvious.
<Radar_> Touchy subject, make it less obvious man
<Stygian> Oh? And how is it obvious?
<fen> ok now its really obvious
<Stygian> Radar_: I'm not denying that I don't have one.
<Shaun> HOW DO U KNO IM 12
<QSC> your online persona smells heavily of basement dwelling virgin
<Stygian> Heh.

Quote #612 (+6) [ 2003-06-01, 19:38 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Baker> I'm taking it as a learning experience.
<Baker> At least no-one was really hurt, apart from my keck
<Baker> err.
<Baker> neck even.
<Folken`> poor keck :(
<ed> You should get your keck looked at.

Quote #1796 (+8) [ 2004-04-01, 13:31 ] [ + | - | X ]

<AERO> better again either a sulphur dioxide bomb or a helium bomb ;)
<AERO> we'd all talk like smelly high pitched barstards :)
<fenix> so we'd all turn into cs players?
<yale|busy> lol

Quote #3173 (+7) [ 2006-01-06, 14:24 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Narcolepsy> In the interim, I will eat.
<Narcolepsy> It'll fill in time, and the hole in my stomach.
<Narcolepsy> OMG!
<Narcolepsy> THERE'S A HOLE IN MY STOMACH!
<Narcolepsy> Oh, wait, metaphorical.
<Narcolepsy> nm, calm down.
<Narcolepsy> The boredom goes *POW*

Quote #526 (+4) [ 2003-05-05, 00:09 ] [ + | - | X ]

<hailmary> Its my Birthhhhdayyyyyy
<Maxwell> has your male stripper arrived yet?
<hailmary> yeh three mintues ago

Quote #3259 (+7) [ 2006-02-15, 14:00 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Teddybear> <outy> ffs i spend at least 16hours a day on irc, i can comprehend anything <-- You cultivate deep understanding like eskimos cultivate sweet pineapples

Quote #2593 (+7) [ 2005-02-17, 22:15 ] [ + | - | X ]

<aftahours> just wait for adsl to be activated Agg :D
<Agg> aftahours - I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR 15 MONTHS!!!
<Agg> aherrrm.
<Agg> calm blue ocean, calm blue ocean.. with lag.. graarrghh
<aftahours> ahahaha

Quote #4115 (-1) [ 2007-05-09, 18:56 ] [ + | - | X ]

<eDust> what's the vista equivalent of su?
<Freaek> su...cker

Quote #2645 (+6) [ 2005-03-25, 13:01 ] [ + | - | X ]

<David> you know what tastes nice?
<David> golden circle sars cordial, mixed with cola :p
<David> instead of putting water with the cordial, just add cola :p
<Milton> I think I will forgo the diabetes cocktail, thanks

Quote #3244 (+6) [ 2006-02-05, 22:03 ] [ + | - | X ]

<csimpson> *removed by request of csimpson because his girlfriend browses this site*

Quote #3570 (+3) [ 2006-09-28, 00:46 ] [ + | - | X ]

<Willay> Don't tell the rest of the channel... but I kinda masturbate thinking about Dopefish with a bottle up my arse

Quote #3202 (+11) [ 2006-01-16, 12:58 ] [ + | - | X ]

<SolidRed> i shot lazers from my eyes during sex
<SolidRed> its an annoying power